Around the time I was 15 I had really bad self esteem issues mostly due to the verbal abuse about weight from my parents and that was when I stopped eating as much and was always working out and I meet this guy online named jack and he would always tell me I how amazing I was but he would pressure me to send pics and videos and like sext and stuff like that and I always would because I needed someone to tell me I was pretty but I would always hate myself afterwards mostly because of how pathetic I was but also because he was 22 so 7 years older than me. That was around the time I started cutting and he just really messed with my head and fucked me up bad to the point where I can't have intimate relationships with anyone. And now with the whole thing on twitter about me too, I was reading about sexual assault and sexual abuse and the effects it can have on people and I've realized since I was a minor at the time the whole jack thing counts as sexual abuse. And I remember telling my friend about him when I was 16 and she laughed and said I was a bad ass for getting a guy older than me. And my other friend found a picture on my phone and he literally grabbed my vagina and he still makes jokes about fucking me but I need him around because even though he's an asshole he cares about me and helps with my mental health. And I'm sorry I totally just spilled that to you right now but I've kept it bottled up for years and I really needed to tell someone that I know wouldn't judge me or make me feel bad about myself.
YOU ARE READING
The Darkness in my Mind
Short StoryThere is a little bit of darkness within everyone, a darkness that we are afraid to reveal to the world. But there is comfort in knowing that others suffer from the same darkness. So I am revealing my darkness to the world.
