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You say that you want me and that makes me feel...

Happy

Sad

Disgusted

Slutty

Needed

Validated

Do you see the problem?

I feel everything at once and it tears me apart

I need to tear my skin apart

To get some peace from the turmoil

I feel like I matter

But then I realize that it is my body

So I feel like dirt,

Like an object

I just don't know what to do

I feel so torn

And I want to tear my skin apart

To punish myself

For what?

I don't know, all I know is that I need

Punishment

Do you see what is happening to me?

I so desperately need love

I need closeness

I need love

But I can never accept it.

Do you see what is happening?

I'm torn

My skin is torn apart

I don't feel at peace

I keep tearing to try and stop feeling so torn

Do you see what is happening?

Because I don't

And that I why I keep tearing until there is nothing left to tear

Until I don't feel torn

Until I don't feel anything

The Darkness in my MindWhere stories live. Discover now