Save Me

Chapter Thirty Nine

I sniffled leaning against Justin's bedroom door. I flinched every time I heard Justin yelling in frustration. There'd occasionally be the sound of of stuff breaking.

I can't leave..

My feet won't let me.

Well more like my heart. My heart is telling me to stay but my mind is telling me to go. I wiped away my tears and stood up. Without thinking I opened Justin's bedroom door. I saw him sitting on his bed with his head in his hands. He was a mess. It kinda made me believe he actually cared about me.

"Give me a good reason as to why I should continue to love you." I blurted out, clenching my fist. I didn't wanna start crying. Justin looked up at me with glossy, puffy eyes. His lips parted slightly, but nothing came out of his mouth. I stepped closer to him. But he just stared at me. Say something!

After why seemed like years of silence I sighed.

"I knew you couldn't give me a reason." I sniffled lifting my eyebrows slightly. I turned on my heels and headed for the door again.

"Whether you love me or not that's your decision, Minnie. I don't think you should love me. I'm a monster. I kill people to survive. I'm an animal. I'm not fucking right in the head. I honestly don't know why you stay. Or why you even bother with me. You always get hurt in the end. And somehow in my emotionless heart I have feelings for you. Strong unbearable feelings. I can't love you cause I'm scared too. I can't love you because I don't know how too." Justin's voice stopped me in my tracks. His words making my heart hurt. I turned around to see him standing there. At this point.. I don't know what to do. I don't whether or not I should forgive him or not.

"You're not an asshole. You're not a monster. You're not an animal. So stop." I snapped at him. He looked at me with questionable and confused eyes. He let out a raspy chuckle.

"There you go again. Defending me after I hurt you, and hurt you, and hurt you repeatedly. Why can't you understand that sometimes you can't always be nice to me? That you can't always forgive me?!" He nearly screamed at me with pleading eyes. His face looked so pained. But I had to stand my ground.

"Why can't you understand that no matter what you do I continue to forgive you?! Why can't you understand that no matter how many time you hurt me I forgive you?! It hurts me but I can't stop!" I inhaled a sharp breathe to stop the tears. Justin's face softened a little bit. He stepped closer to me so that we were only a foot away from one another. His body towering over mine, his eyes darkening as he leaned in a bit.

"Grow a back bone and forget about me." He spat at me in the most nastiest tone. I tried to swallow the sudden lump in my throat. The way he just changes moods. I can't keep up. I looked him in the eyes. I stared into those beautiful hazel eyes and spoke a simple, "No."

Justin breathed out slowly. His face looked pissed off and for the first time today I was terrified. I started walking backwards, slowly making Justin follow me. It was quiet, the only thing you could hear was my heavy breathing. My back finally hit the wall with a soft thud. Each of Justin's hands rested on the wall next to my head. I gulped not knowing what he was thinking.

"I'm a monster.." He spoke looking me in the eyes. His eyes made me feel as if they were piercing my soul. Not only did they looked pissed off but they also looked pained. I wanted to touch him. But I was scared that if I touched him he'd break into a million pieces. This beautiful man in front of me. This beautiful man that I wanted so badly to hold me and never let me go.

"No you're not." I mumbled, my eyes tracing every inch of his face and body. God I wanted him so badly. His right hand cupped my face making me jump softly at the sudden contact. I forgot how it felt to be touched by him.

"I'm not good for you.." He spoke again, his fingers tracing down my next to my collar bone making my heart beat fast. All I could smell was his minty breath.

"You're all I need." I whispered back, closing my eyes. He made me so relaxed. I lifted my hand and grabbed his right wrist, trailing my hand up to intertwine our fingers. I opened my eyes to find his face inches from mine..

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Don't know if she should forgive him so fast or not... Still debating that's why I stopped it there.

Pluuuusss. I do have a dirty chapter coming up. 👏

Thank y'all for the support.

xoxo