Blood Sugar

Part Fifty-Three: Famous Words

John's POV

Chad looked like a mess.. when I thought about it.. he looked like I did when I realized I was not gonna have Kaya. I always knew he was into booze a little too much. But man.. you could smell him from miles ago. "Chad.. you use water for brushing your teeth, not whiskey", I tried to lighten up the mood. He murmured something I didn't quite understand.

Tony and Flea were in the kitchen. I think they had to talk about.. whatever. I was late again so I probably have missed out something. I sat down next to Chad. "Seriously.. you look fucked up. Wanna talk?" He shrugged. "I guess I'm gonna go on tour." "But that's not the reason you drank three bottles of I don't know what." "Lara broke up with me", he said and started sobbing. Man he was so fucking drunk. I couldn't imagine him crying in a sober state. I put my arm around his back and kept silent. He'd talk if he wanted to. And he did.

"I told her I'd leave the band for her and she got all kinds of mad. And.. and she.. oh man.. she wouldn't even try staying with me if I leave", he said. "Shit.. so there's basically no way out?" "No man.. no.. it's over.." "That's fucked man.. I'm sorry.. you know.. I'm in the same situation so I feel you. I think Kaya's gonna leave me, too." "You're dating her now? Congrats man", he said and managed to smile lightly. I gave him a crooked smile back. "Yeah.. for who knows how long." "Chin up, Fru!" "Look who's talking", I said and we both laughed.

Tony and Flea came back in with four sheets of paper and handed us two of them. Flea looked to me as if he wanted to ask me what was wrong. I shrugged and he pursed his lips. "So guys.. the mood is fucked to say the least. But going on tour together actually is a great thing for us as a band. Lindy managed to book us into some pretty cool venues. We'll kick off March 9 in Austin and be back in June next year. But you'll be able to escape in the warm months May, June, July, August. Then we'll basically be gone until January and have small breaks in March and April next year. We'll travel by bus. That's all we can afford for now but will help us bond some more which is something we need.. me and Flea just figured that. Any questions?", Tony said.

"Got it maestro", Chad said bitterly. "Look Chad. I'm not being the bad guy here. You knew about our rule. Sucks you've found yourself someone just now. But I've never had Flea complaining about Loesha not being around. In fact, he thought it would be better if there were no girlfriends around on tour. And I know plenty of examples from friends who confirmed this. You'll be able to see your girls on tour breaks and they can come to our concerts and stay for one or two nights for all I care." Chad stopped him with a wave of his hand. "No no. It's okay. She broke up with me anyway. I'm cool", he said. "Christ", Flea murmured under his breath. "I'm sorry about that Chad. Really", Tony said. "You're wasting your breath", Chad answered. "Do you wanna be in this band or not?" I could see Tony getting real pissed. "Yeah.. yeah", Chad said.

Flea informed us that we had a couple of TV and radio appearances this week, some interviews, too. Luckily it was all in or around LA so we didn't have to leave until next week.

Tony got up to order some food for us and Flea walked up to me and Chad. "Touring is gonna be a hell of a good time, trust me. I know it's hard leaving the girls behind. That sucks. It sucked with Loesha. I brought her once for a couple of weeks. And we fought constantly which drove everyone crazy. She hated every girl around. She hated the bad food. She hated sleeping in the van. She hated the waiting and driving around all the time. For us it's going to be exciting because we're musicians and we love what we do and we get to play every night and hang with other artists and get to know new people. But it's not that cool for a girl to come. And as Tony said.. we know plenty of examples where the girl on tour thing didn't work. In fact.. I haven't heard of one couple where it worked. Some even broke up in the middle of it. So.. think about it that way, too. Please. We really don't want to destroy your love lives. It's more like.. doing the best thing for everyone involved. Even your girls. And come on.. we'll basically be around this whole summer. So it ain't that bad, right?"

I think me and Chad finally fully understood where this rule was coming from. I even felt sorry for Tony and Flea by now. Tony couldn't always show it.. but I knew he knew it was for the best, too. Once again, I was glad to have Flea around. He was so calm and understanding.. keeping the band together. Secretly I felt he had more of the leader qualities.

Since I knew Kaya was not gonna be there when I came home, I stayed at Tony's for dinner and smoked some pot with Flea. He told me he'd invited River and Keanu to the Tour Kick Off Party too because he felt they were pretty cool guys. I had to think about Kaya laying in the arms of that guy and my stomach turned. "Isn't it cool they're friends with Kaya now, too?", Flea asked. "Totally", I murmured. "Do you know how long they'll be staying here?" "As far as I know they both live around here and will be filming the next few months." Great.. so I know who's gonna take care of my girl, I thought and took a drag.

Later, Tony, Flea, Chad and me went to a bar together. I ordered shots with Chad and we drowned our sorrows together until the mood started rising.  Chad gathered a couple of girls around him and I chimed in in the conversation.

I felt the eyes of one of the girls on me from time to time. When I went to the bar, she followed. "Hey, I was about to get a drink, too", she smiled. "Yeah..? what would you like?" "I'll have a beer." I turned my head again and went off. When I just wanted to order, I noticed her standing next to me and looked to her. "I was just gonna order for the both of us", I said to signal to her she doesn't need to be standing here, too. "I know. I'm Helen", she smiled. Wait? Was she flirting with me? "John", I said without looking to her.

The waiter handed us the beer and I turned around and walked up to where Chad was standing. That girl followed and grabbed my shoulder. I turned around. "Hey.. why are you being so stark and stiff?", she said and grinned. She was pretty. But I wasn't interested. And I thought I made that obvious. "I'm not. I just don't wanna talk to you", I said and smiled politely. "I don't believe you", she smirked. I let out a confused laugh. "Well, you gotta believe me. Because I really, really don't wanna talk to you, okay?" She grinned some more which was driving me insane. What was wrong with her? She opened her purse and took out a card that had her number on it, put it in the shirt pocket of my flannel and walked away.

I shook my head and poured down the beer. I didn't want to be there. Talk to random girls and get drunk again. I wanted to be with Kaya. She was the only one that mattered. So I left.. and head to her place.

Kayas POV

I was already sleeping in bed when John showed up. He was slightly drunk and high and begged me to not send him away. He told me the Chilis would start touring next week and he wanted to spend all the time he could with me.

We sat down on my bed next to each other and he let his head sink on my shoulder. As I stroked his chest I felt something in his shirt pocket. "What's that?", I asked him without any motives. He suddenly sat up and took out a calling card out of the pocket. "Don't get me wrong. That girl slipped me that card. I was gonna throw it away but I forgot about it", he said. "So random girls give you their number.. just like that?" "I swear.. she was pretty strange. We didn't even talk.. really. I'm not interested in anybody else.. Why would I be by your side now? I could be with that Helen or whatever now but I'm with you", he said and I instantly felt stupid. "I'm sorry. It's funny.. you didn't do anything but I've got troubles trusting you anyway. It's fucked. This is why I don't think I can keep up this relationship when you go on tour."

John buried his head in his hands. "Aw man.. if only I would've stayed away from all these girls the past weeks.. maybe things would be different. None of them meant anything. It was only you and I wish you could see that. I love you Kaya", he said and looked up to me. Shit.. his words hit me hard. I felt tears building up in my eyes. All the time I didn't believe it when Flea told me John loved me. Now he said it. And it was too late.

He took me into his arms and let me cry my eyes out on his shoulders. "I'm so sorry Kaya. I wish I could stay... Do you want me to stay?" I looked up to him and sobbed. "Of course I do.. but I don't want you to leave the band. I know you belong with these guys. You're meant to do this." John pursed his lips and nodded without looking to me. "Could you do me a favor?", he asked and stroked the back of my head. I nodded. "Would you stay at my place until I have to leave?" I nodded again. "I love you, too", I said and John held onto me even tighter than before.