Ameles potamos

Chapter 39: A mental melody

"What to do now?" I asked myself out loud.

I was sitting in the maze beside me were some of the bushes; the sun had burnt my eyes when I sat on the bench, so I chose the only place in the maze where the bush's silhouettes had covered it with its shade.

My arms were itchy from where the needles had sting my arm, I scratched it roughly when a voice interrupted me,

"I think you're hurting yourself." He said.

I looked baffled and smiled, "No, it's just… you know itching."

He sat down beside me and held my- now- red arm and scratched it gently, "That's how you scratch, wild animal."

I laughed loudly, "Thank you Nickolas… for scratching my arm."

He joined my laughs and stopped abruptly.

"I heard of what happened to you, I knew it. I knew you were insane," he smiled, "Just like me."

"What made you so sure Mr. knows it all."

"I know because you are." He smiled as he echoed my infamous sentence.

"You are never going to forget that, are you?"

He shook his head, "Never in my entire life have I met someone who can come up with such a genius line." He teased.

"Well you're right, I am insane… and I practically killed my best friend. Or you can say helped in getting her killed." I said sadly.

"You didn't mean it." He placed his hand on my cheek and smiled.

I pushed his hand and looked the other way, "I am a terrible person, and I'm a bitch. A terrible bitch."

"I missed you so much." He said faintly.

I looked at him and wondered how can he love a terrible creature like me, I had to tell him everything; I had to tell him what I did and how I ended up here.

"You need to hear me, I was a horrible person and you have to know everything."

"I don't want to know, I don't care." He said as a matter of fact.

"No, you don't understand, it’s a heavy pressure, a weight on my heart and brain. Let me tell you please."

He bore into my eyes and I wasn't capable of looking back.

Then he gave up and said, "Okay, if it makes you feel better."

I started telling him everything I had done, and I kept telling him about the things I did and the words I said, how I dressed and how I acted.

I drew the best picture of the old me in his head, I only hoped he wouldn't be repulsed after I'm done.

Although I'm sure I wouldn't have lived with the thought of him not knowing what I was before, I was beginning to regret telling him everything.

Like maybe sleeping with Dylan, or maybe sleeping after my best friend tried to kill herself.

God I was such a slut. No more can be said.

After I was done talking it was almost 9:00 p.m. and the night shade had covered our planet.

You can only guess that I was crying and couldn't stop for about five minutes after I was totally done.

He just stared at me blankly and probably forgot who I was before I told him about the real me, or the old me.

I would never go back into being that creature; I would kill myself before I turn into that hideous monster again.

After I was done sobbing I looked at him and let out a long breath.

He laughed at my expression and kissed my forehead.

"You said it was the old you, and that's not the 'you' I know now." He said calmly.

He reclined his body on the grass and started staring at the stars, I lay down beside him and our fingers touched.

He sent electricity down my spine. I loved how he reacted. He reacted as if it was no big deal, all of this, as if betraying your best friend and leaving her to her death was a usual thing to do.

I don't want any other reaction, I need him like this. I love him like this.

"Are you getting better? Your new meds are working well?" I asked.

"Yes, they make me so happy sometimes… that it's too weird for my body to comprehend." He smiled.

I smiled and locked my fingers to his, "God only knows how much I want to kiss you right now." I said while looking at his starry eyes.

He smiled broadly then looked at me, I looked around us to check if someone is nearby then leaned into his shoulders and enjoyed his scent that would last in my nostrils for, unfortunately, little time.

He gripped my right arm and pulled me closer,

"God only knows how much I want to do more than just kiss you." He said.

I laughed out loud, and then looked around us to check if someone heard my outrageous laugh.

Fortunately no one did.

Our eyes met and held their gaze when suddenly he broke off the stare and closed his eyes and said,

"I—I  know you Nala, I know you'd never…" he stopped talking and the silence took over, then he just kissed me.

He pulled me into his body, held my shirt tightly, closed his eyes, locked his tongue to mine and kissed me.

Kissed me like never before, he kissed me savagely, and I didn't mind it. I need him.

I needed him and always will.

My whole body was being electrified from his touch, the way he held my face and hair between his hands and fingers made me breathless, I missed him so much.

We finally broke the kiss off and were satisfied by just looking at each other.