My civilisation (D.D)

(CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTEEN)

CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTEEN
' SELF-PITY '

[ O ] phelia sat on the steps just outside of the sanctuary, as she held a packet of cigarettes in front of her. She hadn't had one in so long, not whilst she'd been with child — but, she just felt so shitty. And she wanted to feel the familiar taste of tobacco touch her lips and fill her lungs.

     She knew she shouldn't. She didn't want to. But, she had to. She had to feel better. She just wanted the pain to go away for a little while. She couldn't turn to alcohol anymore, or anything else. The packet of cigarettes in her hand was the closest comfort she had now — Daryl was god knows where, Rick was probably on a death mission, and Carl was dead.

     Ophelia pulled a cigarette out of the small cardboard box. She frowned — angry at herself — as she proceeded to pull out a lighter to light the tobacco in between her lips. It was her brothers. She scoffed at this — he'd have been disappointed in her for giving into her pain. But, he was dead. And so was Carl now. So did it really matter? She tried to tell herself it didn't.

     The girl bought the burning flame to the end of her cigarette, but just as she was going to light it, someone pulled it out of mouth and threw it over the balcony. Ophelia angrily looked up and saw that Eugene was standing next to her.

     "What did you do that for, asshole?" She snarled.

     "I-I'm sorry." Eugene stuttered, faltering under her harsh glare. "It's just, well, a child is growing inside of you and — well, I, uh, I felt obliged to keep him from any permanent damage."

     "I would never hurt my own child." The girl hissed, closing the lid on her lighter. "It was just one cigarette."

     "Mam— smoking during pregnancy can result in premature birth. The baby could also be born underweight, or even sick. It could also—"

     "Are you saying I'm a bad mother?"

     "No! Absolutely not." Eugene insisted, somewhat afraid. "I'd just hate for your child to suffer because of an irrational impulse on your behalf."

     Ophelia looked Eugene up and down somewhat suspiciously. "Why do you care anyway? You betrayed us, remember?"

      "I—I haven't — I — is that what you really think?" He asked. He didn't know how to react. There wasn't anything that, really, he could say.

     "It doesn't matter." Ophelia said after a few moments, looking down the stairs somewhat sadly.

     'What—"

     "We're all gonna die any way. It doesn't matter if we're good or bad." She sighed heavily. "Carl was one of the good guys. So was Glenn and so was Griffin. But, they died anyway, didn't they?"