Learning to Live Again (A Josh Ramsay Fan fiction)

EPILOGUE

It’s been three weeks since Josh has left and gone back home and I miss him every day.  After he left, I spent a couple weeks with the police and the lawyers going over the ordeal and preparing for the trial.  I have been told that it is an open and shut case since they have the recording of the 911 call in which Officer Eric Shaw explained in detail his plan to have me killed.  The lawyers feel as though he may even plead out which would mean I would not have to face him again in court.  I also found out how Mr. Smith got involved with this.  The police told me that after some digging, they discovered that Mr. Smith is actually Eric’s brother in law.  His wife’s step-brother to be exact.  They told me they had this plan in the works for months.  Smith requested release to this jurisdiction, after researching where I would be running the anger violence program.  It was all set up even before he was released.  But what Smith was hoping to get out of the deal was to get out of Canada.  One more conviction, and he was looking at getting a Dangerous Offender designation and would never be released into the community again.

 Much to my bosses’ disapproval, I started back to work last week and, it is strange to be back.  My kidnapping was all over the news, so it is a little strange to run my group of offenders with their own anger management issues.  I am finding it difficult to keep them focused on their own stories, but I like the challenge, I simply remind them that we are not here to discuss my life.  Eventually they focus on their own issues and we are able to work together again.  I have been spending more time with family and friends and have started to do things I once loved again.  I am playing on a baseball team and started running more.  I even signed up for a marathon.  Rick would be so proud, he loved to run and always wanted me to run with him before he passed away.  But, as much as I like the distraction of work, and as much as I love to be living my life again, something is still missing.  I know what it is too, I miss Josh terribly, before he got on the plane I should have told him how I felt.  I told him once that I hated to play games and wanted to be open and honest, I should have told him how much I love him.  But then he may not have gotten on the plane, or would have stayed out of some miss placed loyalty or worse, pity.  It would not have been fair to put him in that position.  As much as it hurt to watch him leave, it was the best decision.  We have two different paths, in two different parts of the country.  He had called a couple times, and sent emails and texts, but I couldn’t bear to respond.  If I did, the scar that was slowly starting to surround my heart would have been torn right open.  Although I was miserable in the romantic part of my life, I would heal, and one day things would fall into place.  Josh helped me to see that too.

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It was Friday night, the end of a very long week.  For once, I was not the last one to leave the office.  I said goodbye to my colleagues and oddly one of my friends at reception said “Just say yes!  Have a great time, you deserve it.”

“Alright, you have a great weekend too?”  I said more than a little confused, and left the office into the warm, sunny afternoon.  The patrons at the bar downstairs were celebrating the Blue Jays winning, finally after a long losing streak, and were as always, blocking the doors from the office.  ‘Geez, you’d think after years of having the Parole Office here, people would clue in, at least a little bit’, I thought to myself.  I opened the door carefully and said,