When We Crash (When Trilogy #2)

Chapter 29

Chapter 29

I Died

"May eroplanong nag crash... at si Yael ang piloto."

Walang sabi-sabi ay tumakbo ako papuntang ER. My heart is rapidly beating inside my chest. Libo-libong mga palaisipan ang ruamagasa sa aking utak. Ni hindi man lang natapos ang isang minuto ay nasa ER na ako dahil sa bilis ng aking pagtakbo.

Tumigil ang mundo ko nang makita ko si Yael na nakahiga sa hospital bed. He's surrounded by nurses and a doctor. The pilot suit that he always wears with respect and dignity was suddenly stained by his own blood. Nanlambot ang mga tuhod ko, I don't even know how I still managed to stand here despite that. Binalot ako nang takot at pangamba.

Buong buhay ko ay ngayon lamang ako natakot nang ganito.

"Sir, what's your name?"

"Can you hear me, sir? What's your name?"

The doctor that I couldn't even recognize anymore did a pupil eye test to him using his pen light. He kept asking questions, hoping that Yael would respond. Naaramdaman ko ang pagtapik ni Nick sa likod ko bago siya lumapit doon para tumulong.

Samantalang ako ay nanatili lamang sa kinatatayuan ko. Para akong nabobo, sa mga oras na 'to ay nakalimutan ko lahat ng pinag-aralan ko. Right at this moment I wasn't a nurse, I was the loved one of this patient lying on that hospital bed.

Para akong nabingi nang mag beep iyong machine at nag flat line ang kanyang heartbeat.

From that moment, I died too.

Pakiramdam ko ay tumigil rin ang puso ko sa pagtibok nito, parang akong binuhusan nang malamig na tubig at bigla na lamang namanhid ang aking katawan.

The memories of Yael and I crashed to me like a tidal wave. I didn't know that millions of realization could hit you in just a second.

Narealize ko lahat nang mga nagawa ko sa kanya; narealize ko kung gaano siya nahirapan sa akin. I suddenly felt the urge to make it up to him. Gusto kong bumawi sa lahat nang sakit na idinulot ko sa kanya noon. Gusto kong bawiin iyong mga panahon na nasayang.

Narealize ko kung gaano ko siya kamahal at narealize ko na hindi ko kaya na mawala siya.

I hope it's not too late.

My palm is covering my mouth to prevent my loud cry to be heard. Patuloy lamang ako sa pag-iyak habang nagmamakaawa sa Diyos.

I'm begging Him to give a chance to be with Yael again and I won't mess it up this time. I will never be the same.

"Code blue! Code blue!" someone pressed the cold blue button as the nurses removed the pillows and flatten Yael on the bed. The doctor started to do compressions pero wala pa rin. The e-cart has finally arrived but the doctor still did compressions, trying to revive Yael. I watched as the nurses manage Yael's airway using the ambu bag.

I was shaking and I was so horrified. Parang ano mang oras ay babagsak na lamang ako dito pero pinilit kong patatagin ang sarili ko. Nanatili akong nakatayo rito at pinapanuod ang team na aligaga sa kung paano maire-revive ang buhay ni Yael.

Some even secured a backboard under Yael and then they continued the chest compressions. May pumalit na rin sa doktor para ipagpatuloy ang compression pero wala pa rin.

I can hear my heart breaking and I can feel it shattering. Ang sakit-sakit pala nang ganito. This pain that I'm feeling right now is nothing compared to the pain that I've ever felt before.