When thugz cry ..
His reality comforted him.
Yet his nightmares suffocated him.
Horror was as well known to him as the oxygen he breathed.
Cory awoke screaming, shaking. Fists balled. He suddenly started shouting out profanities and cursing the day his father was born. There was a strain in his chest, he wanted his Senior to feel the pain he was feeling.
Ignorance was truly bliss. Because at this moment the truth was ripping him apart. He groaned and rolled over in his bed.
'Lee, I'm so sorry I didn't save you baby girl.' He looked to the ceiling, his eyes stung with sadness. Regret consumed him.
He took in his surroundings. He was in his bedroom of the flat that he and Zaire used to share. Home.
His mum came through the door, she watched him in the darkness. She saw his shoulders shaking in the shadows.
'Cory, don't cry honey. It's over.'
'Go. Away...' She knew her son well, he didn't mean what he said.
'Baby?'
He was silent, biting down on his lip so he wouldn't let his emotions get the better of him.
'Cor-'
'Ma...why didn't he try and save us all? Didn't he love us enough?' Sorrow drown his pride. 'He broke m-my heart.' It angered Cory even more to admit that to his mother. Something in him, was so hurt that he couldn't even feel furious.
'He broke mine first.'
'Didn't we- she mean anything to him?' Cory put his head in his hands. 'He's got to live with her innocent blood of his hands. Lord smite him where he's sitting in that prison cell. F*ck him, I know he's gonna rot...Satan's reversed a seat right next to him for Cory Matthias Senior in Hell.' Cory spat and then laughed wickedly, with his unsmiling face. 'Motherf*cker...no man that killed my sister is my father. He ain't sh*t to me, I'm never setting foot in that f*cking prison again.'
*
Something wasn't right.
Cory Senior had been released from questioning and had been thrown back into his prison cell.
He couldn't trust Alexandra, that wasn't a surprise. He had to make sure she wouldn't buckle under the police's pressure.
He waited until lights out then retrieved his blower and called his son. He called several times. No response, that was strange Cory always answered his calls plus he wasn't usually asleep by now.
This was a curious situation. So Cory Senior made some more calls to people on the outside who could give him answers, he had to make sure his son was ok. He had too much invested in him. He was the heir to his throne.
'Evelyn's back.' His phone fell onto his mattress.
Inhale.
Exhale.
She'd told him, he could feel it. In a way, it made what he'd done more real. Leonie's face wouldn't disappear in his vision.
Images flashed before his eyes and Cory Senior gulped. His soul would forever be stuck in this torment and Hell.
He knew this day would come.
*
Cory slipped into the hot bubble bath he'd prepared for himself, Zaire's scented candles still surrounded the circumference of the bathtub.
Pain is the essense, the game is a lesson ..
He closed his eyes and allowed his body to glide deeper under the bubbles. Music played from the surround sound speakers in the bathroom. This was a ritual of Zaire's, the candles, the music. It was so peaceful and it somehow made it feel closer to her. He felt calm for the first time in a long while. His mind drifted to her as it always did.
'I'm sorry Zai...' He said to himself. He told himself that he would apologise to her the next time he happened to see her. Part of him hoped it was sooner than later. Her absent was so apparent. He wished she knew how much of an effort he was beginning to make as a person. Cory prayed that she didn't think he was a lost cause and damaged beyond repair. He hoped that she hadn't completely given up on him.
After his long soak, Cory got dressed in a white t - shirt and basketball shorts and sat at his piano. It had been a while. He lifted the lid of the keyboard, it brought back memories of the times when he'd play for Zaire. It was theraputic to her, his music healed her.
He began to play On Top by Trey Songz, he almost smiled thinking of the times he'd made love to Zaire and she'd insisted on this song playing in the background.
He needed her so much right now.
'Cory...' Evelyn knocked on the door politely. 'Your friends have been calling, you been ignoring them? They said something about them having a welcome home party for your mate Paddy, you up for going?'
Cory had two options.
He could repent and move on with his life or feed all his pain and let the world feel his wrath.
© 2012 MrsMadSwag
