The Dance Between Darkness and Light (girlxgirl)

Alison

You know that moment you meet someone and you can just tell you're going to get along really well? That's how I felt about meeting Emily at the picnic, there was just something there, we clicked almost instantly. Which is good because we are going to be spending a lot of our time together. Really, it's true, we will spend more time with each other than our significant others.  That's what happens when you co-teach with someone.

At first I had no idea it was Emily my daughter was drawn to, but I was watching her interact with Mya, the whole time. I'm not even sure why, but Mya gravitated right to her. Of all the people in that tent, Emily, the one person I've been waiting to meet. If you're a mom you know this; you always have an eye on your child no matter where you are in a room, even in a large crowd. I wasn't alarmed by Mya walking up to her, it was just unusual, she's always had a healthy respect for strangers. Until now I guess? I don't know, maybe Mya could tell she was safe?

When I walked up on them I just waited, and listened. Emily is good with kids, I could tell just by the few moments they were interacting. And this Emily? For someone so young she's incredibly intuitive. Right after we started talking, she started asking questions about Mya, and I got this pit in my stomach that confirmed everything I'd been thinking recently.  She noticed in those few moments she spent with Mya what I've been suspecting for awhile now.

"It's great to meet you Alison, Mya is so adorable.  Please tell me she's in our class?" Emily asks holding out her hand to shake mine.  I take it, and notice her smile right away, full of optimism and excitement.

"Oh, um no, unfortunately not, she's in first grade this year," I tell her.  We are still shaking hands I notice, a little too long, so I let go.

"Oh, that's unfortunate, I was secretly hoping to get to be her teacher with you.  I have to admit, I couldn't stop looking at her eyes, they're incredible! And now that I'm talking to you, I can see they're just like yours," Emily says staring right into me as she glanced up from Mya. She's smiling again and my god this woman is gorgeous. I can see that plain as day and so can a lot of other people staring at her around us. But my eyes? Please, she's being modest now because hers blow mine out of the water. I don't think there are words to describe the deep shade of brown they are. I've never been jealous of another person's eye color in my life up until now. But I'll humor her for a bit.

"Well thank you, we actually hear that a lot.  My husband has the same blue eyes, too, so I guess it was bound to happen," I say casually, I'm trying not to stare.  But I can't help myself now and the words just pour out of me, "What about yours? Your eye color is..." I'm at a loss for words now so I say the first thing that comes to mind, "...beautiful."  My cheeks are burning, I can feel it. It has been a long time since I've said that to someone, but Emily took it in stride.

"Oh, they're just brown,'" Emily said and she shrugged it off. "The world is full of people with brown eyes."  No, not like hers. It's just not.

Now remember I said she's intuitive, right?  You could have knocked me over with a feather with what happened next. 

"I don't mean to be too forward, but Mya seems a little sad, like I could see it in her eyes, and her expression when I was talking to her.  Is she okay?" she asks me.

Who is this woman? She doesn't even know Mya and she can see something is wrong.  Can she tell I'm struggling, too?  I looked away quickly, I'm not ready to have this conversation with someone I've just met. I'm skilled at curbing conversations with people, I can give Emily just enough to steer clear, so that's what I set out to do.

"She's just a little sad, her dad left on a work trip yesterday and she misses him," I tell her, it's the truth, just a limited version, but Emily doesn't back down. Her eyes narrowed, a small crease furrowed across her brow and I see true empathy all across her face. Empathy for Mya and for me.