4 days later
Jeremiah POV
Madre❤️: how are you feeling
Me:idk
Madre❤️: I take it you don't want to talk ab it over text so we can talk after the funeral later. Keep ya head up son
Me: ok
I don't know how to feel about my moms death. She was dying right in our faces and we didn't even know it. How am I supposed to feel when I'm the first one to notice that she wasn't breathing anymore; there's no coming back from that.
And on top of that, Jordan's mom passed right before mine. We dealing with the same type of hurt but in different ways. When reality really began to hit her, she started lashing out on me but I understood, so I'd let her fuss and then hold her when she broke down. Every time. It was like a show that was continuously on repeat and there was no way I could turn to the next channel.
The apartment was quiet as we worked around each other, getting ready for the funeral.
"Get out my way,"She pushed me out of the bathroom and slammed the door in my face.
"Lemme get my shoes,"I mumbled from the other side of the door. The door opened just a little and my church shoes flew out. I shook my head and slid my feet into the shoes. I know she's mad but she's starting to make it really hard for me not to snap back at her. I'm trying my best to keep my cool.
When we pulled up to the spot, I placed the black shades on my face and got out.
I gave a weak dap to the men in the family and half hugged the women. It's something small; only people my mom knew could come. It's a very private situation that the whole world does not need to see.
The whole time the director was talking I was in my own little world, with my head on Jordan's lap. Her fingers ran through my hair; she does this when I'm not feeling well.
"Would anyone like to say anything before—,"The director started to ask but stopped talking when Madre got up from her seat. He moved from the podium, giving her the spotlight. The television that was hanging from the ceiling switched from a family picture to a picture of Madre and Mom. In the picture, they were in the middle of a conversation. Dad just so happened to catch them laughing.
"It's been a long ten years. Ten years of a deep friendship and I..."She took a minute to breathe, tears streaming down her face.
"We lost her just like that. Gone just that fast. We have so many memories, don't even get me started on the things we've accomplished together. She's a strong woman, mother, wife, friend. She's touched our hearts in so many ways and I'm sure she wouldn't want us crying over this."Madre wiped her face with a tissue that was given to her from the director. "She'd tell us to rise above this situation. So that's what we have to do and I know it won't be easy to get used to this but we have to, for her. Nicki won't be here physically, with us anymore but she will forever remain in our hearts. That's all I have to say; if I say anything else i might just burst into tears again."She rushed back to her seat. I wiped my face.
I couldn't watch them bury her. When everyone got up to go to the burial site, I went to the car. Slamming the door shut, I locked myself inside.
"Madre says she wants to talk to you."Jordan said after I unlocked the car so she could open the door.
"Ion feel like talking."I muttered. "You can't escape her."She replied.
"For the time being, I can. You gon' go or what?"
She sighed and started the car. "Did you want something to eat?"She pulled into the parking lot of Buffalo Wild Wings.
"Nah."
After turning the car off, she turned to face me. "I'm not gonna let you starve. If I have to shove a wing down your throat, I will."She got out of the car and went into the building. I pulled out my phone and went straight to snapchat, not to post anything but to search. I wasn't looking for anything in particular, just viewing other people's stories.
"Dayum, they really doing that outside."the person in the background of a video stated. The person zoomed in on the two people that were posted up against the wall of a house. I couldn't really tell what was going on because of the movements going on around the camera, all I could make out was that it was two girls in a garden. They must've been doing some freaky shit though. I exited Snapchat just as Jordan came back.
"I got a mix of lemon pepper and those other two that you like."She sat the bag in my lap and took off. "Thanks."I told her.
"I think that's your mothers ashes."I picked up the cardboard box and she unlocked the front door to our apartment.
While I took out my food, she opened the box. "Yeah, that's her ashes. I think I'll put the urn up here."She sat the urn on the mantle above the fire place.
"Nice."
"It's in her favorite color too. She loved gray."
"Is that why you like gray too?"
"No. We like it for separate reasons. I love gray because it symbolizes a mixture of good and bad. No matter what bad things I do, I am not a bad person. And all the good in the world... you know the rest."
I nodded. She left the kitchen to change out of her funeral outfit and into something comfortable. Peacefully, I was eating my food until my phone started to blow up with notifications from Instagram.
They were from people tagging me, trying to get my attention to look at a post on dramalert's page. Before looking at the post, I read through some of the comments. "I've had enough of that."I told myself, leaving the comment section. I viewed the post, seeing the same video I saw on Snapchat. This time, the video was clear as day. I could tell one of the girls was giving oral sex. The camera panned to the girl on the receiving end. I damn near dropped my phone and choked on my food when I recognized the face. A cough escaped my lips as I tried to calm myself down from what my eyes just landed on. Oh hell naw...
What y'all think about to happen?
