Bed Sheets

Window Wind

We got onto the highway and sped out of the inner part of the city. The cars were blurring by and my head was pounding. I didn't know what she wanted with me, fuck, I didn't know what I wanted to do with ME. Honestly I'm just some fucking lonely stoner boner, my life has no fucking meaning and I feel that every day, but lately I haven't felt that every minute of every day, just , most of the time.
The shops of downtown sped by as she cranked up her shitty stereo and pushed her head into the headrest. She had a menacing look on her face, intimidated, I just sat in the passenger seat, fearing her anger.
With no clue why she was so pissed I just sunk deeper into the interior of the car. 
She was blasting the butthole surfers, as the rough electric guitar rang through my ears, I stared at her pale face as she stared stiffly ahead, I knew she knew I was looking at her, I was trying to get something out of her without actually committing.

We were out of the city now, cruising the outskirts on some old crusty highway deteriorated with rain.
"Are you going to fucking talk to me or do you just want me to leave you alone?!"
I was finally too frustrated to keep in what I was thinking and belted at her. She cocked her head and pierced me with her stone cold eyes, I couldn't read one emotion and she still didn't say a word. She creased her lips and looked back at the road with a furrowed brow.

"I don't know."
She said exhaling and turning down her stereo.
"Than why did you want me to come with you if you won't even look at me?"
I felt like crying, like letting my chest burst open right there and get all over her white Nikes.  Her foot pushed harder onto the already stuttering gas pedal. Her hand unclenched and the color returned to her knuckles. I had absolutely no idea how to read her at this point, she was completely helpless.

The car sped on and we still sat in angry silence. My question still lingered in the air. She slowly let her foot off the gas and let the car coast to an easy speed.
"Fuck Noah, I just don't know."
She creased her forehead again after exhaling her sentence.  My breath quickened.
"Do you want to stop and maybe talk about it because we're not really getting anywhere at the moment."
She rolled her eyes and continued to let the car coast to a stop on the side of the road.  She turned to me and stared into my eyes with the look of "tell me now or get out" I knew she was bullshitting but fuck.

"Well fine. Were you avoiding me at the coffee shop?"

"Now why the fuck would I be doing that?"
I think I pissed her off
"I don't fucking know you just seemed like in a panic when you saw me and you didn't come to school that day, of course I'm going to assume it's because of me."

"Well fuck Noah maybe it's not about you."

The car went silent.

"Yeah you're right I mean it's not like I fucking like you right?"
I poured under my hoodie trying to keep the heavy feeling off my chest. I raised my eyes to look at her cold cheeks. Slowly, a tear glided down her ivory cheek. The sun hit her so beautifully, with the evening sun going down and moist air breezing through the car.

She didn't brush the tear away, she let it sit on her cheek like a rare object. A long sigh rang through the air.

"I'm sorry."
She let out and blinked away her tears.

She leaned over the console and rested her head in my lap. I looked down to her face and brushed the strands of hair that covered her skin. No more tears came, but I saw in her face she was crying, just without tears I guess. I just wanted to hold her in that moment and stand still against the world with her behind me.

We rested on each other for at least two hours. The sun was gone and the cool ground enveloped us together.