Bed Sheets

Loozer Town

I continued to stare at the dirty dishes and sip my black soup drink. The coffee we had in the house was low quality, basically gas station sold  instant coffee. So in other words, dirty dish water. This taste might have been influenced from the 10 minute stare off I had with the sink but I wasn't going to stop now.

I felt like a moron for trusting her and letting her pull me into an almost fuck boy like portrayal of feelings. Feeling off and sad, I travelled up the stairs and into my bedroom. I lifted up my mattress and pulled out my baggy of greens. Grabbing. My pipe out of my bag, I continued to pack a bowl on my window ledge.

After "sparking up with the boys" as I say, by myself. I put my shit away and crawled into my unmade bed. I pretended that smoking was making me happier, but honestly I was just thinking about it more. The early morning clear skies started to make way for the dreary afternoon, so classic from Oregon. A slow hum of the Main Street, three streets over, filled my ears and I splayed myself out like a starfish.

I continued to listen to the humming and pretended to hear her car revv down my street. I closed my eyes and continued in this fantasy until I heard the front door drag along the wood floor. The floor creaked into the kitchen and back into the hallway until the stairs leading up to my room creaked and my door was flung open. I played myself into my fantasy and expected to see a beaming Billie to come and make a romantic breakfast. It was my dad.

My heart broke a bit further and I rolled my eyes and slumped back under my comforter. I felt his look on the area I was under my blankets, not to mention I was slightly slow at the time due to my drug happenings earlier. I just wanted to hide and avoid contact. I wanted to be sad and listen to sad music while I cry and watch YouTube.

"You been here all day?" My dad scruffier with a tired tone of annoyance.

"Yeah." I replied, dragging my words over my emotions.

"Yeah ok Noah."
I almost heard his eye roll. Honestly me and my dad were just slightly altered versions of each other, while that explains why we either hate each other or are best friends, depending on our mood changes. The floor boards leading out of my room creaked and he didn't bother to close my door. He didn't seem to remember I actually go to school.

I pulled myself over to shove my face into my pillows, falling into a depression nap.

Four hours later

By this time my high wore off and my body woke out of its sadness induced coma. I knew my parents were home from the noise of the tv in the living room under me. I didn't want to talk to them so I decided to leave. I slipped into my coat and laced my shoes. I opened my crusty bedside window and leaned out onto the side of the house. I slipped down the side and landed by the backyard tree. Pacing myself away from the house I tried to ignore my still lingering emotions. Cutting across the three neighboring houses, I drew closer to town and the Main Street connecting my street to it. I could feel my clothes and how they moved and I threw my left foot in front of my in a walking motion.

I found myself on the sidewalk next to the road. Cars whizzed by, directed out of town. The indentation lines separating the squares of sidewalk was running through my head and I had the "step in a crack, break your mamas back" stuck in my head, stepping on every crack. Ignoring the passing traffic, I continued to focus on this until a sharp honk jumped me. I pulled my head around and focused on a car pulling off to the side of the street next to the sidewalk.

Squinting, I connected the dots that, yes, the car had stopped for me. My Brian was slow and finally actually noticed that it was Billies truck. She stayed in the truck and stared at me with an almost blank expression, her eye brows were furrowed. I made my decision and got into the car.

I sat and stared at the dash board, I didn't want to be the first one to talk, I wanted her to show that she wanted to say something. Not because I was mad, just because I felt like a stupid kid that had over reacted.