Is it bad that I wanna kiss you right now?
It didn't surprise me at all that he'd ask. I felt the sexual tension but I didn't feel it was right to make any moves. Especially not after just getting done with Luke. Not that Luke would care anymore anyway, he had a girlfriend now. I've had an attraction to Ashton since the day I met him, but I've managed to keep it at a halt.
I think it's the weed. Why else would I randomly want to kiss him? Why else would I want to be so close so suddenly.
"Yes, but no." I finally respond, seeming to surprise him.
"Huh?"
"I don't know." I sigh, keeping my eyes fixed back on the TV. Ashton kept his eye on me the whole time though, I could feel it. "It's not bad but it isn't good." I say to him and I actually hear him laugh.
What was so funny?
"Alice, babe. I'm gonna need you to start making sense." A part of me wanted to scold him for calling me babe but another part wanted to kiss him for it.
"I don't trust you, Ashton," I speak. I didn't trust him. He could just turn on me and do as he did before. "You could kiss me, we have sex, then what? What am I to you then? I'm not trying to repeat what happened last time. Plus, Luke and I just got done sorting shit out and I honestly don't know where my feelings are right now." I sigh deeply, finally looking at him. He's been listening and watching me this entire time. His lips are turned downward slightly and I didn't want that for him. I didn't like it.
"I'm sorry, Alice. We don't have to then." He shrugs simply and looks back at the TV.
"I'm sorry." He looks back at me.
"For what? You have nothing to be sorry for, Allie. Nothing," His frown becomes deeper and I find myself wanting to see his smile again. "You are perfectly fine." I nod.
"Im sor-"
"Alice Hood, I swear to god if I hear one more apology come from your mouth." He cuts me off before I can finish my sentence, chuckling. It causes me to want to smile.
"Right. Yeah." I almost apologize again and he shakes his head. We both watch the movie that randomly played on Netflix. Ashton grabs the remote and turns it off. We were barely watching it anyways. He rubs his face and closes his eyes.
"I'm getting tired and it's getting late." He sighs.
"Oh, yeah."
"Do you want a ride home at all?" As much as I didn't want to bother him, I did not want to go home. I couldn't, not tonight.
"Would it be a bother if I stayed the night?"
"Oh," He looks at me, eyebrows raised. "I mean if you want to, I don't mind." I nod and he stands up unexpectedly. I watch as he crosses the room, going over to his clothes. He pulls a drawer open, taking out a maroon tee with our school mascot on it, along with matching grey sweatpants.
"Here. So you're comfortable." He tosses me the clothes and I catch them.
"Thank you." He nods, getting back on his bed and I just begin to get undressed, not really caring if he sees. He's seen me naked before, so this is nothing.
Once I get my clothes on I hop in his bed beside him, leaving a bit of space between us. I turn my back toward him and close my eyes, cuddling the pillow and trying to drift to sleep. That is until he starts to speak quietly, without warning.
"I've thought about you a lot since that day. You know, since the cops came and took you back home," He speaks behind me. "I've been hoping you're okay." I don't really speak. I just kind of listen with my eyes closed.
