ADRONITIS (II) : tmr minho

41: I could be Kissing

Leo 41

It's silent at the breakfast table, and not because we are too busy eating. There are only two apples to share between the five of us. Not that it matters; no one is eating them. Dawn has already given me her share, perhaps because I'm pale but more likely because the food reminds her of Joe and Joe is dead.

I didn't lose anyone at yet. Which I guess makes me lucky. Michelle lost three, and Ella one, and I've got no one gone. There experiences are inherently alien. It isn't that I want to know what it is like to lose someone, but I don't know how to lift my hand in comfort. I can't even comfort Teresa, who has lost Thomas temporarily to a Griever sting. She barely eats any of her food.

"Thomas is doing better?" She asks. Dawn attempts to lift her head and make eye contact with the girl, but the bags under her eyes keep her chin firmly planted to the table. After they took Joe, she was up all night with me.

Michelle only stiffens. Her finger nails dig into the flesh of the apple held idly in her hand. Why did Teresa have to bring Thomas up?

"He's a lot better," I tell them. "Should be up any minute."

Michelle slams herself up, pulling away from the table and walking away. Her red hair swings about her, swallowing her whole. No one moves or chases after the angry girl. She just needs to blow off steam anyway. Fighting this anger is only going to further her pain. Honestly, I don't know what's helping it.

Teresa looks down in her lap. She doesn't apologies, but she techincically shouldn't anyway. Michelle imagines Thomas to be evil, although after this week I can't blame her for seeking anywhere to lay blame that isn't herself.

"Just excuse her," Dawn remarks. "She forgets there is a whole universe outside of her."

Teresa nods, continuing to stare down at the wooden table. "I wasn't trying to set her off."

"Believe me, you don't need to try," Dawn attempts to reassure her, offering a week smile. Then, she glances from the food down beneath me to my mouth. "Eat."

I nod, picking up a carefully sliced apple quarter. My teeth bite down. Its juice runs down my lips, unbelievably sour. I could starve to death, I'm always going to hate these damn things. While I chew, I look back up at them. Swallowing quickly, I continue the conversation.

"Thomas is looking a lot better though. I was just in there this morning." I try to affirm Teresa's confidence, since she needs it. "Better than most of us anyway. Safe in there too."

"He'll wake up tomorrow," Ella, in her weird prophetic ways, chimes in.

Dawn stares at her blankly, before rolling her eyes. "Don't listen to her. She's sick."

"I'm sick of your shit." Ella snarls, before getting up from the table as well. She storms away, in a fashion I've never seen her do before. There's not just blankness in her walk. But feeling. Intensity. I doubt she is mad at Dawn, but there is something that enrages her.

"What's shit?" Dawn asks, peering around. "You know what she's talking about?"

I shake my head, glancing over to Teresa. She is suddenly pale, paler than her already ghostly skin. No wonder though, Ella can be a bit scary.

"She's been off it lately." I tell them. "These last few weeks. It's been different."

"She's always been jacked," Dawn clarifies for Teresa. "Just, never so chatty."