more than this | grayson dolan (book one)

four

A loud bang coming from downstairs makes my eyes jolt open. I'm instantly woken out of my deep sleep, causing my heart to beat extremely fast. I quickly check my phone and see the time of 4:30 am.

I lightly groan as a yawn leaves my lips. Another loud sound shakes the inside of my house. I get out of bed and go toward the stairs, seeing my brother laying at the bottom of it.

"Jake." I mutter and stare at him.

"Help." He groans as he struggles to get up.

I shake my head in disappointment and rush to the bottoms of the stairs. His eyes are closed and he's holding onto his stomach. The heavy scent of tequila takes over his mouth and body, along with the smell of freshly smoked cigarettes.

"Come on." I whisper as I wrap his arm around my shoulder.

I use my weight to pull him up as I wrap my other arm around his back. He heavily groans in pain as I lead him up the steps. It's always a hard task to do, but i'm always successful. I lead him over to the bathroom and place him in front of the toilet.

He immediately begins to throw up, vomiting all over the place. I grind my teeth as I look away from the sight. He continues to gag over the toilet while his body squirms around.

"You're okay, just let it out." I mutter as I pat his back.

He eventually stops and flushes the toilet, wiping the corners of his mouth. He closes the lid and leans his elbow on it, placing his head on his hand.

"I'm sorry, Stella." His voice cracks as he closes his eyes.

"You said you would stop this bullshit." I sigh as I look down at him.

"I can't help it, it's who I am." He shakes his head back and forth.

"No, it isn't." I lean against the sink and cross my feet over each other. "You're better than this, Jake. You're better than him."

"He's not here, is he?" He opens his eyes and looks at me with a sad expression.

"He never is." I whisper as I look down at my feet.

"It's his fault i'm so fucked up, he's the same way. He's going to come home at eight in the morning drunk off his ass." He slurs as he runs his hands through his messy hair.

"You just need to sleep it off." I uncross my arms from my chest.

"I want to be better." He sighs as he looks at me. "It's just hard."

"I know you can do it." I slowly nod.

"Life fucking sucks." He states as he pushes himself to stand up.

"Yeah, it definitely does." I help him walk across the hallway and into his room.

I guide him over to his bed and lay him down. I take off his combat boots and throw them on the floor before wrapping his body in the covers.

"You're the best little sister ever." He says into his pillow as he closes his eyes again. I freeze for a moment as I stare down at him. The term little sister doesn't really apply to me anymore. I'm the one always taking care of him, when it should be the other way around.

"Goodnight, Jake." I whisper as I watch his chest rise and fall.

Small snores come out of his mouth as he falls asleep. I quietly walk out of the room and shut the door. I go back to my own room and crawl into bed, staring up at the ceiling.

My usual dark thoughts begin to consume my brain. I wonder what my life would be like if I was a normal eighteen year old, if I had loving parents and a brother who wasn't so fucked up. I guess that wasn't in the cards for me.