Suicidal Love

twenty two

Cam's POV:

It had been a few days since Serena started to live with Carter and I and it's been amazing. She has been decorating her room for 2 days now, and she hasn't let us in to see it yet. I don't mind though. As long as I know she is in safe hands, I'm happy.

I was eating some spaghetti and Carter came down the stairs.

"Hey man, how's Serena doing?" He asked, and I smiled at her name.

"Shit. You are crazy for her." He laughed and grabbed some Coke out of the fridge.

"Do you think she will give me another chance?" I said, looking down at my food. This thought has been running through my mind since she moved in.

"ARE YOU KIDDING?" He yelled, and I shushed him. "You are letting her stay in our house, and you bought her basically everything she owns!" He said in a quieter tone.

"Yeah, but money isn't going to buy her love back."

"But your generousity will." He said and walked to the staircase.

"HEY SERN! ARE YOU ALMOST DONE?" He yelled up to her. Sern was her nickname that he came up with. We both then heard steps running down the stairs and Carter's eyes lit up, not in a good way.

"Dang, you look like a mess." He said, I walked over to where he was standing and I saw her, covered in paint.

"Hey!" She said, laughing at Carter's remark. "Do you guys want to see it?" We both nodded and she led us to her room. We walked inside and it was incredible. Her bed was black and white bedding along with a matching nightstand. Her closet was already full from all the clothes and shoes I bought her the other day, no I wasn't complaing. There were posters of old bands all alined her wall. She had a huge Beatles poster of Abbey Road, and she had other posters of KISS, Nirvana, and Led Zepplin. I looked around even more and I found pictures that she had taken. Some of them had dates on the bottom, and the most recent one said March 31st, 2014. That was 10 months ago, so not too recent. She had pictures of her and her friends, her mom, and some of just the world around us. I sighed, she looked so happy. On the last wall, she had a huge map. There was a little box of pins right next to the map.

"What are the pins for?" I asked.

"Well, if I can get a better job and get paid enough money, what I want to do is throw a pin at the map and wherever it lands, is where I will adventure to." She smiled, she looked happy for once, and I loved it.

"This room is sick Sern, good job." Carter said, giving her a high five.

"Yeah, I love it babe." I covered my mouth with my hand, surprised that I let that word fly out of my mouth. She just laughed.

"It's okay Cameron. I glad you guys like the room though." She giggled and we all left.

"So, what do you guys want to do?" I asked.

"I was going to throw a party tonight. You guys should join!" Carter said. I looked at Serena, she didn't look too pleased by the idea.

"I think Serena and I will pass on that idea." I said, not trying to hurt Carter's feelings.

"It's cool. You guys should go out to see a movie or something. I heard that If I Stay movie is pretty good." He said, offering up suggestions. I saw Serena's eyes light up out of the corner of my eye.

"You wanna go see that?" I asked, and she nodded her head excitedly.

I chuckled at her childish ways, "I'll check the times." she squealed and ran downstairs. I laughed and went to my down. I lied down on my bed and sighed. I pulled out my phone and scrolled through my music, finding my favorite song 'Take Care' by Drake and Rihanna. It was pretty old, but lately it's one of the only songs I have been listening too. I know why, and honestly, it's a bit creepy. While I was snooping through Serena's journal, I found a page filled with quotes from different songs. Most of them were Ed Sheeran and Sam Smith, but there was one quote that really stood out to me.

'I've loved and I've lost.'

That was all it said, and I'm sure all it meant to her were that fact that it was a catchy toon, but to me it meant more. I plugged my earbuds in and listened to the song over and over again. All I could think about was her. All I wanted was here. She was my whole heart, and she knotted it in two, so our love would never untie, but it hurt sometimes. It hurt a lot of time. At so many points, all I wanted was this knot to be loosened and I could be freed, but now I know why it stayed tied, because she's back. And she isn't going anywhere.