Suicidal Love

twenty four

Cam's POV:

After the movie ended, we walked out and Serena had to go to the bathroom. I was greeted by some fans and I took some pictures.

"I'm so glad you are back on social media again." One of them said. I smiled at her, these girls were my pride and joy. I love them more than anything.

"Who's this girl you are with Cam?" One asked. I decided to be completely honest, if they were real fans, they would support me through this.

"Do you guys remember Serena Quinn? She was my best friend at the hospital." They all nodded, but some looked a little surprised.

"It's her." They all were surprised, but they all eventually smiled. They knew she killed Nash, I expected them to be really confused.

"I love her guys. I love her more than anything, she is the reason why I'm back on social media... she's the reason why I'm still here actually." I smiled and they all awed.

"Hope you know that I'm your girlfriend though Cam!" A girl yelled and we both chuckled.

"Of course babe." I said, kissing her on the cheek. A few moments after, Serena came out and she jumped back a little from the amount of girls talking to me.

"Guys, meet the beautiful Serena Quinn." I said, pulling her into me and kissing her cheek. They all awed louder than before and she was redder than a tomato.

"Uh hi guys, it's nice to meet you all!" She said to all of them.

"Can I get a picture with you?" A girl asked. She was taken back by the question, but then agreeds and took the picture. After fiftheen minutes or so, all the girls cleared out and so did Serena and I.

"Tonight was really fun Cameron." She said, getting into the car.

"It really was." I said, looking at her. It almost annoyed me that she called me Cameron. Everyone called me Cam, she did at one point too. She wrote about it in her journal, how she purposely called me Cameron because calling me Cam made her feel like she was just traveling back to the past.

"Why do you call me Cameron?" I said... it just slipped. I couldn't turn back now.

"Because that's your name..?" She laughed.

"No, I mean, everyone calls me Cam. You even used to."

"Oh, I didn't notice. Sorry Cameron." She said, then sighed.

"See! You just said Cameron!" My temper rose.

"Why are you getting so worked up about this? It doesn't even matter!" She yelled.

"You won't say it because it reminds you of the past!"

"Cameron-"

"It was in your journal!" I sat there. I felt her eyes on me, but I just kept driving. Why did I say that?

"How could you!?" She yelled. I sat there silent... How could I?

"I'm sorry I-"

"Bullshit." She opened the car door and walked out. I didn't even realize we had gotten to the house. I ran into the house after her, there were people laying on the ground blacked out. The party must've been crazy. I heard her scream upstairs so I followed the sound. She was standing in her room, throwing clothes into a bag I had bought her.

"Leave!" She screamed.

"What are you doing?" I yelled back, ripping the bag out of her hands.

"I'm leaving Cameron. You obviously can't be trusted." She said sternly. I cringed when she called me Cameron, I'm not sure why. She pushed me away and she grabbed the bag.

"Why am I so stupid?" She said to her herself, walking out of her room and down the stairs.

"YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME." I yelled, I ran down the stairs before she could walk out the door. I pushed her up against the door, she looked frightened.

"Let me go." She said.

"You can't. You know that you will come back anyway." I said seductively, making her suck in more air.

"No I won't." She tried to get out of my grip, but I wouldn't let her.

"I know what I did was wrong... but babe, I read your notebook to figure out what I need to do to get you back." I sighed. "And it's been working." I rubbed my hands down her body, making her goosebumps rise.

"Cameron." She let out a breath. She knew she wasn't going to win. Even if she tried, I wouldn't let her. I needed her.

"Yes babe?" I whispered into her neck, leaving small kisses.

"I have to say something." She said, ripping herself out of my grip. She pulled out her notebook from her bag, flipping to a page with a chart on it that I hadn't read.

"Did you read this page?" She asked, I shook my head. She sighed, leaning up against the wall as I stood there watching her every move.

"Why I should give up: no house, no job, no friends... no family." She read. Shelet a tear fall as she spoke of her family. I was confused, I thought she had her mom still.

"Why I need to continue: Cameron will save you." She read, then slammed the book shut, as if she was disgusted by the words on the page.

"I thought you were here to save me, but all you do is rip me to pieces." She cried. I had to explain myself for why I did what I did.

"For the last year, I have been going crazy, I have been losing my mind." I spoke quietly, she looked up into my eyes. "But no one even sees it, no one fucking cares." My voice rose and I grabbed my hair, trying to relieve the anger in my mind. "When Nash died, everything for me fell apart. So I gave up, but I was given a second chance. I didn't know why I lived through my suicide... until I met you. I realized I was meant for you. That's why you feel this way. I was meant to save you. That's why I read your book, I wanted to know if I was physologically fucked up, or if you felt the same way too. I couldn't figure it out from just the several pages I read... But I still didn't want to give up on you. Now I know, I'm not messed up." I sighed, looking down at the floor. Suddenly, I felt two arms wrap around me, making my body warm on the inside. I felt whole again, so I hugged back. Never wanting to let go of her.