Do you want to know a secret?(mclennon and starrison)

Chapter 43

Johns POV

I made my way over to Paul's house, thinking over my decision. do I really want to do this? Of course I do ,I think. I mean I love cyn and everything but then there's Paul. he was there for me when no one else was. he was there for me when my mum died. he taught be bloody guitar for crying out loud!

Paul's house was coming nearer and nearer and my nerves were rising. my heart beating so fast in my chest that it felt like it was going to explode. deep breaths Lennon. you can do this. I felt the sweat drip down from my forehead...i can't do this! But before I could change my mind, I found myself outside his house.

I took in a deep, shaky breath and knocked three times. I waited nervously, sometimes thinking about turning back and running.

The door opened;there stood an extremely skinny paul. I gasped and shook my head. "paul.." I couldn't believe what I was seeing

"If your here to see George then you can't. he's not in. him and ringo have gone on a date."

He was about to shut the door, but I stuck my foot out. " Paul I'm here to see you." he gave me a weird look before letting me in.

It felt weird being back in the house I once lived in. everything thing was still the same." what do you want" he said bluntly. I was a bit taken back by his attitude. I was going to shout but then I remembered why I'm here. "Paul I made a mistake. I should have never treated you the way I did. seeing you like you are now, makes me realise how stupid I was". Paul stood there, arms crossed,no expression on his face.

I stood up and hugged him. I felt tears rolling down my face, I need him. "please macca I'm so sorry forgive me." he put his week, boney arms around my body and hugged me back.

"But what if your hurt me again?" he whispered. my heart broke at his voice and neediness. I sat down on the sofa and pulled Paul into my lap, holding him tight.

I remembered those bruises I saw on his belly, and I got a little curious. I let him go,seeing the hurt in his face, and lifted his jumper up. I gasped;not believing what I was seeing.

Paul had a slash mark of where his heart is and all over him were tiny cuts and bruises. he quickly pulled his jumper down and stood up."you hurt me..".

"I know I did Paul and I'm sorry!please" I walked over to him and grabbed his skinny arm. he pulled away and looked at me, tears running down his face.

"I can't do this john! you say your sorry but you end up hurting me again. I can't take it any more...i almost killed myself!" I stopped and looked at him. was he being serious? " john you hurt me so much that I didn't want to be here any more.you ignored me for months and you still act like I don't exist!".

I ran my hands through my hair and let out a groan of frustration. "Why are you being so difficult! I said I'm sorry!"

"What do you expect for me to forgive you so easily? it's not that simple john!"

His face was red and puffy from crying and I felt my heart ache. I need him. he needs me. we need each other. I stood in front of him and took his hand in mine. his once hazel eyes were now a grey colour. his dark brown hair that was always full of life was limp on his head.

"Remember that time I told you I loved you and I kissed you?" I said rubbing his hand. his sniffed and nodded. " I meant it, I really do love you Paul. I always have" I leaned in and kissed him softly on his chapped lips. I put my arms around his boney figure and continued kissing him.

His lips attacked mine, wanting more by the second. he was hungry for love:my love.

I pulled away and grinned as he touched his lips.

"Wh-what was that?" he asked,his knees shaking.

"Me showing you I never stopped loving you."

"I hate you john Lennon!" Paul said before kissing me again.

A/n:omg this was the last chapter! 😭 the next chapter will be the epilogue or what ever it's called aha. thank you all so much for reading! I love you all so so so so much !

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