Without You

Don't Give Up

Stevie woke up around 9 am the next morning. The doctor had been by to check on Stevie and her vitals.

Stevie was doing well and the doctor told Stevie that he would release her soon.

Dr. Phillips took out her I.V. then let her change into her clothes.

Lindsey helped her out of bed, although, Stevie was already feeling a whole lot better. She told him she could change on her own.

Lindsey let her be and she walked over to the bathroom and changed from her hospital gown to her clothes she had on when they arrived.

Stevie pulled on her leggings then before she put on her blouse, she turned to the side and stared into the mirror.

She touched her belly with one hand and rubbed it up and down. She raised her eyebrows.

How did I miss this? She thought as she felt how different her belly already felt. Now that she knew she was pregnant, she could see a very very small bump. Although to everyone else, it was non existent.

She planned to call her doctor as soon as she got home to make sure the baby was okay and to see how far along she was.

Lindsey walked over to the bathroom and checked on Stevie. He stared at her; she was standing in her leggings and bra. He couldn't help but smile as he watched his wife inspect her belly.

"Steph?" He said.

Stevie dropped her hand from her belly then turned to Lindsey.

Lindsey stepped into the bathroom and asked. "You okay?"
"Yes. I'm fine." Stevie said.
"What were you doing?" He asked as he walked closer.
"I just...I still can't believe there's a baby in there." She chuckled. Stevie smiled more at Lindsey and felt so much more happiness than her previous reaction. "We're having a baby, Linds!"

Lindsey chuckled and kissed Stevie's lips. "We're having a baby!" He repeated.

After Stevie pulls on her blouse, they walk back to the room to wait for Dr. Phillips to release Stevie.

Stevie sits back on the bed and said. "Linds...let's not tell anyone about the baby yet. Especially, Sara. I want to find out how far along I am and if the baby and I are doing alright. When the time comes, I think you and I need to tell Sara first with just the three of us. Well...maybe Michael can be there too so he could support her. Oh, Linds! I'm scared to tell her. But I know we can't keep this from her forever."

Lindsey sighed sadly, remembering what their daughter has recently went through. He sat down beside Stevie and said. "I know. I'm sure it's going to be hard for her but, as you said, we cannot keep this from her."

Stevie teared her head on Lindsey's shoulder and he rested his cheek to the top of her head.

They were quiet, each thinking of so many things. They thought of their seven daughters and what they had been through as a family.

From the time they hardly could keep food on the table, to their start in Fleetwood Mac and onward.

Stevie had both tears of sadness and happiness in her eyes as her mind thought of the baby she lost and now of the new baby growing inside her womb.

By the time they knew it, Dr. Phillips came back into the room with Stevie's release papers and her prescription for prenatal vitamins.

Lindsey and Stevie were able to leave the hospital without being noticed.

When they arrived home, it was now 11 am.

They were greeted by Sara and she hugged Stevie tightly. "Mom! I'm so glad you're home. How are you feeling?" She asked.
Stevie pulled away and gave Sara a small smile. "I'm feeling a bit better. But I'm still on the mend. I'll have to see my usual doctor tomorrow for a follow up."

It was true. Stevie wanted to see her regular doctor the next day. She needed to know if her baby was okay.

"That's good." Sara said. "Would you like something to eat? Or a snack?"
"I'll take a snack. My stomach still isn't feeling too great." Stevie replied.
"Okay, I'll make something small for you, mama and for dad I'll make him a sandwich." Sara said.
"I'll make my own sandwich, sweet pea." Lindsey said. "Thank you, though."

Sara nodded and smiled.

"Did you have any trouble with any of the girls this morning?" Stevie asked as she followed Sara and Lindsey to the kitchen.
"Nope. Well...Aria did have a small freak out when I told her you weren't home. She wanted to tell you good morning." Sara replied. "But I promised her you would be home once she got home from school. She calmed down after that. Then I gave her her medicine after we ate breakfast."
"Awe! My baby girl." Stevie smiled a little then sighed.

"You okay?" Sara asked.
"Yes. I'm just still so tired and I just want to go to bed." Stevie said.
"Go lay down, mom." Sara said. "I'll bring up your snack in a bit."
"Thank you, sweet girl." Stevie said. "I'm going to take a quick shower before I lay down."
"Okay, mom." Sara said.

Lindsey and Sara stayed in the kitchen and talked as Lindsey made his sandwich.

Stevie walked upstairs to her bedroom and grabbed some pajamas then walked to the bathroom to shower.

After her shower, Stevie put on her pajamas then walked over to her vanity and picked up her brush. She brushed her hair to get the tangles out then let it air dry into her natural curls.

Stevie put down her brush then walked over to her bed and laid down.

She sighed in relief to be able to lay in her own bed. She closed her eyes for a moment and just relaxed, enjoying the silence.

"Mom?" Sara's voice said coming from the doorway.

Stevie opened her eyes then sat up. She smiled at her daughter and motioned for Sara to come in.

Sara walked in holding a bowl of fruit and a glass of water. "Hopefully the fruit sits well with your stomach. If not, I can make you something else."
"This is fine, sweetie. Thank you." Stevie said as she took the bowl from Sara.

Sara set the glass of water on Stevie's nightstand. She then walked over to Lindsey's side of the bed. She then climbed up on the bed and sat by her mother. Sara laid her head on Stevie's shoulder.

"How are you doing, baby girl?" Stevie asked.
"I'm doing...I'm doing okay." Sara replied. "It still hurts but...but I know I need to go on. I'll always remember my baby, but maybe one day I will be able to hold a healthy baby in my arms."
"I know it'll happen." Stevie said. "Just look at what happened before I had Aria. I don't want to make this about me, but, I just want you to see that it'll happen. Don't give up."

Sara smiled a little and nodded. "I love you, mama."
"I love you too, sweet girl." Stevie said.

Stevie put down the bowl for a moment and hugged Sara. Sara hugged her mother and felt like everything was going to be alright.

Stevie then goes back to eating her fruit and every so often she would sip some water.

"Mom..." Sara said after a while.

Stevie looked over and waited for Sara to go on.

"I think it's time for me to go home." She said. "I need to try to go on with my life. When I get home, I am going into the nursery and confronting it. Once I'm ready, I think I want to donate some things that we had already bought for the baby. I think that some other babies could use them."

Stevie smiled a little and said. "I think that's a great idea. I'm sure those items will be put into good use."

Stevie and Sara continued to talk and both fell asleep an hour or so later.

Lindsey walked into the room to check on Stevie and couldn't help the smile that crossed his face.

He walked over and kissed his girls on their foreheads, tucked them in then left them to rest. Before leaving, he grabbed the empty bowl and glass so he could wash them and put them away.

Sorry I've been gone for a while. Life got in the way and it's been heartbreaking and just still can't wrap my mind around what happened.

Anyway, thank you for your patience and more to come soon.