kik group chat

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pepe: patrick. i'm so sorry. i treated you like shit. i said things that i didn't mean. and i swear i didn't mean them. i regret them. so much. i hurt you, and i swore to myself that i was never going to do that. i swore to myself that i was never going to treat anyone else in the way that i was treated a few years ago. ryan came and knocked some sense into me. and no, i'm not writing this because he told me to. it's something i should've done this afternoon, when all of this happened. i just want to tell you that i should have said "i love you too." that's truly what i wanted to say to you. and i know i should've done this in person, over skype, over the phone. but i couldn't. i didn't know if you'd meet me or pick up the phone. i didn't know if you'd give me a second chance. hell, i still don't know if you'll give me a second chance. i'm just hoping that maybe, just maybe, this point i'm making will get across. i was in the wrong. i treated you wrongly. honestly, right now, i could sit through for hours and edit this, try and tell you exactly how sorry i am, but there's no words to describe how much regret i'm feeling right now. this would turn into a pity fest. and i don't want that. all i want to tell you is that i do love you. i really do. and i don't know what i was thinking, saying those things. i don't know why i said them. i don't know where they came from. i didn't mean them. they just... came out.

pepe: i'm sorry, patrick. ❤️

trick: i understand why you reacted like that. i really do. but it did hurt. a lot. and to be honest with you, i don't know if i'm over it yet. i'd love to be able to just tell you that it's okay, we can start over, everything's forgotten about, but i can't. i know that you didn't mean what you said, but i can't bring myself just to act as if this never happened. i always told myself that i'd ditch someone who made me feel like shit just for being me, and i swore to myself that i'd make no exceptions. and i never wanted to say this - never - but you're different. i've liked you for so god damn long. i've never liked anyone for that long. but i can't just go straight back. does that make sense? pete, i forgive you, but i'm never going to forget it. and as much as it hurts to say this, can we not go straight back into a relationship? can we wait a while, please? just a couple of months. i need to make sure i'm over this. and i need to make sure that you're okay. i need to know that you're actually ready for a relationship, even though /that/ relationship was a long time ago. again, i didn't want to say this, but honestly? i think it's for the best that we have a break. still friends though, yeah?

pepe: god, you don't know how much i'd pay just to be your friend after this.

trick: you don't have to pay anything.

pepe: we're going back to how it was before we were dating, right?

trick: of course.

pepe: in that case,, can you add me back to the group chat?

trick: :)

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trick has added pepe to the chat!

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a/n - yes i'm very sorry this is short. i had mocks all of last week, and i have three more exams left, and they finish on wednesday. so yeah, i'll try to update more regularly again after that. i just really don't want to fail these ones.