Endless

20 Days Before

20 DAYS BEFORE

Thursday afternoon. I climb out of Marcus' car and stand on the sidewalk outside the station house. He gets out of the drivers side and comes over towards me. He places his hands on my hips before leaning down to kiss me goodbye. He breaks the kiss and rubs his nose with mine.
"Enjoy your afternoon bug," he says with the most gorgeous smile on his face, my heart melts at the sight of it.
"I shall try," i poke my tongue out at him, "I love you."
He gives me a quick kiss before moving back towards his car, "I love you more." he says back as i am walking away.
"Not possible," i shoot back over my shoulder before heading inside.

I ride the elevator up the 3 floors with the biggest grin on my face, still buzzing from my day with Marcus, my mind just transports me back to the park. Lying on the grass as he feed me grapes, i will never be able to erase the happiness that was present on his face the whole time. I was lying on my stomach next to him as he continue to drop grapes into my mouth, he was so surprised and cheerful about my lack of resistance when it came to the food he offered. I never realised until that moment how badly i hurt him with my habits over the past few years. He told me that watching me enjoy food gives him great comfort, as he was heartbroken before watching the love of his life starve herself to death. He said he understands i will never be completely comfortable with food, or obtain the curves my body type requires; but he doesn't care as long as my body gets the nutrients it requires and continues to function. It's such a comforting thought to know that he stands by me no matter what.

The doors open on the third floor and i walk out and into the squad room. I see Zara and Noah playing on the floor by Nick's desk. I keep my head up and walk past Noah, wondering how long it will take him to recognise the familliar sound of my heels on the floor.

Apparently it's not very long.
"P, you are not even going to say hi?" I turn and watch him stand up from his sitting position and walk towards me.
"I was doing an experiment," he looks at me so confused, "never mind. Hello Noie." He smiles and reaches up towards me, and i pick him up.
"Hello P," he kisses my nose, "how is Marcus?"
I chuckle, "he is good Noie thanks for asking, sha'll we go see your mom now." He nods and we turn and head towards Liv's office.

I push open the door. "Hey Liv," i watch Elliot jump back and away from her and move quitely towards the door before leaving. I look up at the celing and sigh, before looking at her with a disapproving look. "Seriously? at work?" i raise my eyebrow as she moves her files trying to look busy.
"Hey I'm the boss, what are they going to do about?" she shoots back.
I open and close my mouth trying to find a decent arguement, "well i can't argue with that," i shrug.
She looks at me with a satisfied smile, before reaching for her son. I give her Noah who happily sits in his mothers lap, moving papers all over her desk the way he has watched her do many times before.
"So what can i do for my beautiful children?" She places a kiss on Noah's head before looking back at me.
"Well i feel like half a double chocolate oreo cupcake and was wondering if you wanted half a vanilla cupcake?" I smirk at her and watch Noah's ears perk up at the sound of cupcakes. "And obviously take Noah and Zara to get one each also." His grin is priceless.
"Well now that sounds fabulous, especially after the day i've had with yet another dead end, with this case." Noah jumps down from her lap and runs over to me.

"Okay! Okay! Okay!" he yells, he grabs my hand a pulls me towards the door, "cupcake time! cupcake time!" We leave Liv's office, "Zara come on P is taking us for cupcakes," he reaches his hand out towards the girl, she gladly stands and takes it. We walk towards the elevators and ride down. Noah gabbering on the whole time as if he has already had a rush of sugar. Zara is quite happy to play along with him, getting quite hyped up herself.

We get outside and cross the street and walk the four blocks to the cupcake store. We walk inside and have a look at the menu, i glance out the window while the kids choose their cupcakes. I notice a dark van drive past but no really pay much attention. 25 minutes and 5 choice changes later we walk out of the shop, Noah's face already covered in frosting as he tries to shove his cupcake in his mouth as fast as he can.

The street is surprisingly quite for a thursday afternoon, i notice as we make the walk back to the precinct. We make a stop for a moment at the fruit shop to talk to Mr. Alexander about his fresh new apples he got in yesterday. Noah is fasinated so we stay for a bit longer. I feel a chill run cold up my spin and the hairs stand up on end, i pull Noah closer to me so he is standing in front of me, I turn to grab Zara when i notice she is gone. I search the street quickly and notice a man carrying her across the road into the alley, she doesn't seem to be moving. I have to move fast and make a quick decision. Hopefully its the right one.

"Noah i need you to stay here, do not move." I look up at Mr. Alexander, "please call Liv now and do not let him out of your sight," I say as i begin to sprint across the road towards the alleyway.
"Peyton!!" I hear Noah yell behind me, but i tune him out and dash through the traffic, why did no one stop him? How come no one noticed?

*        *        *

My phone rings on my desk, the caller ID says Peyton. I look at my detective's as they stand in my office.
"Okay hold that thought," i raise my finger as i answer my phone, "Hello P," no answer all i can hear is static, and as i am about to say her name again, i hear her voice filter through the phone but it sounds like she is not directly talking to the phone.
I look each of my detectives in the eye before placing my phone on my desk and turning on the speaker.

"Zara sit behind me and move as far into the corner as possible love. Don't make a sound, don't move." i hear her whisper, "i'm scared," Zara's quivering tone breaks my heart and my eyes shoot up at Nick and the tears fill his eyes.
We hear a van door slide open and close, and an engine start.
"Well aren't you goregous," a man's voice growls, we can hear shuffling as i suspect Peyton is moving as far away from him as possible, shielding Zara from his eyes.

"Look you can't just leave my brother in that fruit shop by himself, you have to let us go get him," i don't even listen to the rest of the converstation, i leave my phone on the desk for them to deal with and i take off at a full on sprint. I hear Elliots footsteps pounding behind me as we rush to the fruit stand to get Noah.

We get there and he seems to be safe, not a scratch on him, I hug him tight. I can feel him crying, i lift him up and he wraps his legs around me. I kiss him over and over again.
"Mamma where is P," he sniffs, "She didn't come back for me." he begins to sob terribly and i look at Elliot as the tears stream down my face. 'What do i tell him?' i mouth.
'The truth,' he mouths back.
"P is trying to save Zara from some bad men baby, that's why she left you here. She couldn't take you with her and put you in danger too." I carry him out of the store after thanking Mr. Alexander.

*        *        *

We stand in Liv's office just staring at the phone, waiting for Peyton to give us a landmark, anything; but we know she has to be careful because otherwise she could risk putting both her and Zara's lives in jeopardy. I look at Nick who looks like he is about to be sick. When a male voice filters out from the phone once again.

"Well who is this little cutie behind you?" he asks, "touch her i kill you," Peyton moves and her phone must have fallen out of where ever she had it hidden as we can hear it hit the bottom of the van, before the man picks it up.
This time is voice is fuming, "you little bitch! I am going to rape you and beat you so bad, and make this girl watch. Before i make you shoot her." His evil laugh makes us all cringe as we hear the phone click off.