I Love You, My Friend - Song Mingi

#36

The next day, I decided it was time to look for my mother. Since my father was gone, I could go to their room. I remembered my mother had allergies, and she had been given medicine from her doctor. If I could figure out who her doctor was, I could call him. Maybe he knew were she was. I went to my parents room, and started searching my mothers nightstand drawers. But I didn't find anything.
I should check their bathroom.
I found a medicine cabinet in the bathroom, and started searching through it. But all I found was some painkillers, and some other pills, I couldn't really tell what it was. I tried reading the labels, but they were in English.
The pill bottle had my name on it. What is this? It was prescribed to me when I was 13 apparently. I couldn't remember taking any pills.I decided to use a translation app on my phone. But when I did, I wished I hadn't.
This has to be some kind of sick joke.
Antipsychotics..
Why would I use that? No.. I couldn't have. I would have remembered something like that.
And I'm not a psychopath.

I should throw these away. But I couldn't, because I was too curious. I decided to take them with me. I still hadn't found any of my mothers prescription drugs, so I kept searching. I finally found some with my mothers name on it. There was also the name of her doctor on it.
Now I just have to find out where he works.
I took the pills with me to my room, and went on my computer. There was about 20 doctors in Seoul with the same name... this is so frustrating. Would I really have to call all of them? maybe I could pay my fathers work assistant to help me. She could probably find out something if she just.. made an effort.
I was interrupted from my thoughts, by my phone ringing. It was Seonghwa.
- seonghwa.. you're so stupid.
I told him, as I accepted his call.
- hello to you too.
He said, and laughed.
- I never asked you to take the blame for me.
I said.
- I wanted to.
He said.
Why did he insist on helping me so much?
- you should have.. talked to me first.
I said.
- I told you I wasn't done helping you.
He said.
- why are you helping me so much.. when you don't even want anything in return?
I asked.
- I never said I didn't want anything from you.
He said.
- then... what do you want?
I asked him.
- I'll.. tell you in person.
He said.
Maybe if Seonghwa came over, I could show him the pills I found. I wasn't sure if I could talk to Mingi about that. What if he thought I was crazy?
- can I come over?
Seonghwa asked.
- I was just about to ask you.
I said, and laughed.

Seonghwa arrived at my house about an hour later. He was acting a little weird. Maybe I shouldn't show him the pills. I should just ask him what he wants from me. But for some reason... I felt nervous about it. What could he possibly want from me?
- is everything ok?
Seonghwa asked me.
- yeah, why?
I asked.
- you just seem like you need to talk.
He said.
- I do.. but I don't know if I should.
I said.
- I thought you trusted me.
He said, and sighed.
- ok, Fine.
I said.
We went up to my room, and I started looking for the pill bottle.
Where did I put it?
It was under my bed for some reason. Oh... so is my hairbrush. I had been looking for that.
- since you already have that in your hand, maybe you should brush your hair?
Seonghwa said, and laughed.
- I'll do it later.
I said, and giggled.
- I need to show you something. But you can't freak out.
I said.
- it takes a lot for me to freak out.
Seonghwa said.
- well, lucky you.
I said, making him laugh.
- Here.
I said, and handed him the pill bottle.
- what is this?
He asked me.
- it's... antipsychotics.
I said.
- are they yours?
He asked me.
- apparently. But I can't remember taking these.
I said.
- well, it sort of does make sense you would need these.
He said, and smirked.
- it's not funny.
I said.
- but giving them to a thirteen year old seems a bit extreme.
He said.
- I never took them.
I said.
- are you sure?
He asked me.
- yes. But... I have to find out where they came from.
I said.
- why can't you just ask your parents?
He asked me.
- I can't, because... they don't care to tell me.
I said.

I didn't want to talk about it anymore, because it made me anxious. What if I was sick? In the head? I should just throw them away and forget that I found them. I put the pill bottle inside my nightstand drawer, and sat down on my bed. Seonghwa sat down beside me, and it felt weird. He shouldn't really sit in my bed. But I guess it was ok.
- you said you wanted something from me.
I said.
- I do.
he said.
- I guess I owe you.
I said.
- but it's ok, let's just forget about it.
He said, looking embarrassed.
- Tell me.
I said.
- I want you to... kiss me.
He said.
He's joking right?
I started laughing, but stopped because he suddenly looked upset. He's not joking.
- No.
I said.
- why not?
He asked me.
- that's a really stupid question.
I answered.
I couldn't believe he would ask something like this. He was supposed to be my friend.. and that's all I wanted. And I didn't want to lose him as a friend either.
- I know you love Mingi.. but I've learned to live with that.
He said, and grabbed my hand.
Why was he doing this?
- It's ok that this won't mean anything to you.
He said, and moved his face closer to mine.
I should feel uncomfortable.. but I'm not.
But that didn't mean I liked him. Or that I wanted him to kiss me. I was just... surprised that he wanted to.
- Don't do this.
I told him.
- I'm sorry.
He said, and got up from my bed.
- I should probably go now.
He said.
- we're still friends, right?
I asked him.
- Yeah, of course.
He said.