maniac ; caleb finn

21

Caleb's POV
I sit in the tree in front of her house unseen by anybody that looks my direction. I'm sitting against the large trunk my legs dangling on either side of a branch I'm laying on. I rub my eyes as I continue to stare at the front of the house letting my mind wander to everything that's happened since I met Lilac.
I've spent the last 6 months being with her. I feel my eyes beginning to become glossy again as my mind drifts to all the pointless movie nights she's had with me, the amount of times I've almost burned down her little kitchen trying to make her breakfast, her eyes going wide when she realizing what's happening. The way she would tilt her head to the side when she was confused and the small jumps she would do when I scared her on purpose.
She was perfect.
And I wasn't.
I wouldn't ever be enough for her I was too dumb to realize that. I sigh shakily when I see her little white door open. She walks out and sets a piece of paper on the small swing that sits by the window. Her eyes were red and puffy and her high ponytail now sits low on her head as small wavy bits sit around her face.
Even in this this state she was the prettiest girl I've ever seen. She looks to my direction probably looking for me. I zone into her listening to all of her thoughts.
'Caleb if you can see or hear me. Come back. I have to explain everything to you.' She says quietly to herself. She looks around the yard for a moment until she sighs and turns back around and close the door quietly. I hear her small foot steps travel up the stairs. I look at the piece of paper on the swing and sigh jumping out of the tree and walk over to grab it. The front is labeled Caleb as certain bits of the ink bled from drops of liquid littering the paper. Tears.
I open the letter shakily and and let my eyes slowly drift to the paper,
Dear Caleb,
I love you. I know you probably can't stand me
anymore and I'm sorry for everything.

I still love you.

I didn't know I loved you until you left but I do and I regret everything I ever did to hurt you. I'm sorry I met Calum and I'm sorry I pushed you away.
'Sure' I think rolling my eyes.
I understand if you don't believe me but I saw my mom. She said I was the only one who could help you. I want to help you. I don't know how but I have everything I need to help you.

My heartbeat picks up when she mentions her mom.

Come home and I'll help you. We can start over. I want to get to know you now. For real. As you. Not some demonic fuckboy I thought you were.

Ouch.

I miss you and I want to spend my life with you and I find it so dumb to push the person you love most away and I'll never forgive myself. I hope to see you soon.

Lilac, I love you.

My heart aches as I want to run back into the house, tell her, 'it's okay! I forgive you!' Picking her up and spinning her around and kissing her. But half of me believes what I just read wasn't real and that I'm slowly going crazy. I crumble the piece of paper dropping it at her door step and walked away. I walked until I found the nearest restaurant. A bar.

a/n: I know it's short and it's kinda a filler chapter but I plan on trying to post ONE more update today but no promises.

I'm so sunburned help lmao. Thankyou for 14k thats crazy

Maddie xoxo