The walking cliche

An extremely uncomfortable invasion in my left nostril

Jake

"I feel like we accomplished something great today." Code said. Everyone else agreed. Even classes had started a few minutes later than usual so people could get rid of the maggots.

People suspected us but no one had proof so we didn't get punished. We were all feeling pretty smug about it.

Was there anything better than a good prank and girls frantically running around in their bra? No, there wasn't.

"We did." Snake said absentmindedly. We were all staring at the panicked people in front of us. Unfortunately everything was quieting down and things were turning back to normal but the lingering feeling of succes stayed with us the entire day.

After school I went to the store because I needed to pick up a few things for my date with Tessa. We hadn't had a proper date in a while and I needed to step up my game if I was gonna win this challenge.

She'd planned our last date, although I wouldn't call taking a walk in a forest full of great and traumatic memories would count as an actual date. For a romantic person, she really sucked at planning dates. And then she asked to go on a double date. If I could stab myself in the eyes so I wouldn't have to go on a double date, I think I actually would.

Being the stubborn idiot that I am, I saw an opportunity to be obnoxiously romantic on a double date. As if that was possible, but if I succeeded, I'd be a fucking legend. If I were lucky, I'd be able to make the school's golden boy look like a dick. The irony would be touching.

Anyway, I was gonna postpone that hell for as long as I could. Right now, I needed to make up for the date where it started to pour. This time, I checked the weather forecast and it was supposed to stay dry.

I took a detour from school to the store so I could have some more alone time with my one true love; my bike. The moment I arrived and had to leave my bike, was almost painful. Not just because I had to leave my bike, but because a girl with platinum blonde hair and a face full of slightly orange make up approached me.

"Hi Jake." She said in a fake raspy voice. I think she was trying to go for seductive.

"Tasha, only peasants go to stores like this. The mall is the other way." I told her. I wasn't even trying to be polite with her but the girl just never gave up.

"Oh, Jake you're, like, so funny." She smiled.

"Yeah, my mom thinks so too." I deadpanned.

"I'd love to meet her!" Tasha gushed.

"Tash, what do you want?" I sighed. I'd boned her once at a party. It was dark and I was drunk and apparently she had the time of her life because afterwards she got clingy. She wanted a relationship and when I said no she suggested we'd just fake a relationship but she'd still give me sex.

For some reason she still thinks I'll say yes some day even though this was years ago.

"Nothing, just wanted to say hi to you." She said.

"You did. Bye Tash." I said and locked my bike so I could go inside of the store.

"Wait."

I should've known. Things were never easy with that girl.

"What?" I asked.

"I'd stay away from Tessa if I were you. I mean, she has a boyfriend at home." Tasha said quietly, as if anyone would hear us.

"Sure she has." I laughed.

"No, I mean it. She told me herself. She's constantly talking about him and how she can't wait to go back home at the end of this year." Tasha explained.