Summer //hood//

33. Apology and Regrets

Ever since the dinner last night, Calum had been acting really weird. He didn't talk much like he usually did. Everytime he smiled, his smile wouldn't even reach his ears and his eyes were lacked of the enthusiasm and happiness.

Summer had tried many ways to make him talk about whatever his problem he was facing right now but he would always deny it, telling her that he was okay. Although she had only known him for almost 5 weeks, Summer could tell that he was lying.

"Calum, please just tell me what your problem is," Summer pleaded. She didn't like the way he acted today. She felt like he was pushing her away from him. It just broke her heart to see him distancing himself from her.

Calum glanced at her from the corner of his eyes but then he looked straight again, looking at the ocean scenery in front of them with a blank expression on his face. "I don't really understand," he began to say after moments of silence. "I just don't understand how could you act that everything's fine when you know that we're going to be apart in a few days?"

Summer was caught off guard with his words. She had never thought that Calum would say something like that at all. His words only made her sad because it reminded her of the day when they were going on their separate ways.

"Is that why you're acting this way?" Summer braced herself to ask. "Because- because we're going to be miles away from each other?" Her voice cracked as she said this.

Calum didn't say any word. He just looked at the scenery in front of him with clenched jaw and sad expression on his face. It broke Summer to see the sad expression that he wore on his face.

After the dinner with Calum's family, no one dared to bring up the conversation about Calum who was going to go to Sydney for his career anymore. Ever since that conversation ended, Summer tried her best to ignore the sad feeling in her heart and tried to shove it away to the bottom of her heart. She didn't want to remember about it at all. She had thought that after the wedding, Calum and her would fly back to London and Summer would introduce him to her family.

All of the perfect imaginations that she had created in her mind since the day she realized that she was falling for Calum finally came crashing down in a second when Mr. Hood mentioned the news to her. Calum wouldn't be there for her in every precious moments in her life in the future and the thought started making doubts grew inside her. She wasn't sure if Calum would go to London just only to visit her or if she would go to Sydney to visit him. She even wasn't sure how they could communicate with each other with the time difference and their activities schedule.

She knew she was the one who said to the others that they were going to be fine although they were going to be miles apart from each other. But that was just something that she said to assure herself that everything was going to be fine. She wanted to believe that they were really going to be okay but the fear inside her was always telling her the otherwise, making her doubts even grew bigger and bigger than before.

One month with Calum wasn't enough for her. She wanted more. The fact that there was only a few days left before they parted from each other just made her sad and broken. They had just started dating three days ago and now the first problem that they were facing as a couple was this separation. She knew that they were not going to be apart from each other for forever. She knew that one of them could always visit each other every year, but because of the fear inside her, she had this thought that maybe this relationship wouldn't work- that Calum and Summer wouldn't last long.

She'd thought if she could just pretend that nothing was going to happen in a few days, it would be alright. She'd thought if she could just pretend and stop thinking about it, the fear and the doubts inside her would disappear. It worked well, until Calum mentioned about it a few minutes ago. The fear and the doubts came back to her and they probably would laugh at her when what she was afraid of comes true.