Mini Skit #22 *If Batwoman aka Kate Kane aka Bruce's cousin was in Gotham*

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*Bruce and Kate walk on separate sides of a railroad station. They continue to do this until they spot each other* 

Bruce & Kate: *both gasp in surprise and then run towards each other* 

Kate: Bruce!

Bruce: Kate! 

*They embrace* 

Bruce: How are you? It's been so long! 

Kate: You haven't changed a bit! *while cupping his face with both hands* And yet, you've grown up so fast! 

Jeremiah: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! *record scratch* Whoa. Whoa. *walks up to them in a brisk pace and stops in between* Who is this thot and why is she interacting with my man? 

Kate: *snobbishly* I think the better question you should be asking yourself is, "Who the f*** are you?" 

Jeremiah: *snobbishly* Who the f*** are you? 

Kate: I asked you first. 

Jeremiah: I asked you second. 

Bruce: Jeremiah, first off, How dare you? Second off, she is not a thot, she is my cousin. Third, she is a lesbian. And fourth, we have never established that we are dating! 

Jeremiah: *turns to him* Oh. False alarm. 

Bruce: *threateningly* If you hurt her, like you hurt Selina, so help me, I will- *gets cut off* 

Jeremiah: *interrupts him and hugs Kate from the side* And what a lovely cousin she is. She will make a great cousin-in-law. 

Kate: *breaks away and her and Bruce walk away from him, leaving Jeremiah alone* Bruce, who is this guy? And why does he keep prattling on about how he is your boyfriend? 

Bruce: Oh, him? Well, it's a long story. But as for who he is, that's the resident terrorist and weirdo in this city Jeremiah Valeska. 

Kate: Wait! That's him?! The one that you told me about in your letters?! The one that caused No Man's Land?! 

Bruce: Yeah... He's basically a fusion between the incel and the soulless redhead stereotypes... But if they both were put on steroids... 

Kate: *disgusted* Eaugh... Then, I definitely do not want someone like that *gestures to Jeremiah* as my future cousin-in-law. I'd rather prefer that clone of yours that you told me about in your letters. And that girl you know. What was her name again? *she ponders this for a moment* Samantha? Sasha? Selma? 

Bruce: It's Selina. 

Kate: *snaps her fingers* Oh right. 

Bruce: Anyway, let's change the topic. What are you doing here in the city? 

Kate: Oh, I just came here to visit my girlfriend for a few days. 

Bruce: Oooh, who's the lucky lady? 

Kate: Renee Montoya. 

Bruce: *wolf whistles* Go get her. *chuckles* 

Kate: Oh shush. 

Bruce: Anyway, want to go to my manor? You could spend a few nights there. Plus, I'll introduce you to Five in person. 

Kate: That's sounds good actually. I have been looking for a place to stay throughout my visit to this side of Gotham. 

*They both get inside the car, Bruce drives them both to the manor*

Ask/Dare Bruce, Jeremiah, Edward, Oswald, 514A, & Jerome - Gotham *OPEN* + MSWhere stories live. Discover now