just one day

51.

It was awkward. Not knowing how to apologize for lying to him and sneaking around but also how to tell him I still didn't trust him.

Him and I haven't spoken a word to each other since the fight. I don't consider him coming home drunk, and him rambling about how he loved me... talking.

I wanted to though. To talk to him. To tell him how I was feeling but I knew it would only make things worst. So instead of talking, or being an adult... I let him be.

I know he's still pissed at me and has every right to be, just like how I have every right not to trust him.

I hear him sigh annoyingly as he was pushing the cart. "There is it" I say in relief grabbing the pack of ramen off the shelf.

"I don't think cooking for him is going to make things better between you two" Jin says.

I turn to him placing the ramen in the already full cart. "I'm not cooking for him. I'm cooking for me" I tell him.

Funny how he thought I owed him an apology or something. I don't. Sure I do for lying, and sneaking behind his back.

But it wasn't like I was cheating on him, and he's done far much worst to me, then I did to him. So.

Such as you asked.

Such as the following:

- not telling me he was supposed to get engaged to his ex for some stupid agreement.

- for leaving me to go take care of his ex when she was lying

- for knowing his mother was the one who planned that whole kidnap shit.

- for also... well, I can't think of anymore other reasons then that, but I can promise you there gonna be more.

"Why don't you just talk to him?" He asks as if that was easy.

I let out a deep breath, "I can't talk to him if he doesn't want to talk to me, Jin"

"Wow, I hope your marriage isn't going to be like this" he states causing me to process the fact that I was engaged to him.

I roll my eyes at his comment, "whatever, let's go to check out. I'm tired and I want to get home so I can sleep" I explain to him.

-

I sighed deeply as I finished eating, alone. I cooked dinner for Yoongi, so we can at least have dinner and talk.

But he wasn't home. He actually didn't even inform anyone on where he went in the first place.

It was around ten, and Yoongi still wasn't home. You would think about last night he wouldn't be out so late.

I struggled to keep my eyes open forcing myself to watch television, more like the television was watching me. I kept dozing off or either taking little cat naps hoping he'd walk through the door anytime soon.

Him and I needed to talk, but the more and more I stayed up the less and less energy I had to think about what to say to him.

The door finally opens and I quickly stand up from the couch, I shut the television off and walk to the front door.

I watch as he slowly closes the door and quietly locks it as if he was a teenager that snuck out, and was just sneaking back in.

He turns around and walks to the stairs when I stop him, "Yoongi" I say my voice soft and calm.

"Oh.. your up. I thought you'd be sleep by now" he says so awkwardly, mind you this the only conversation we had in like hours now.

"yeah. I made dinner"