Loving the Ruthless Wave

Wakas

"Ma! What happened?"

I shouted as I stormed in inside our house. Kakahatid ko lang kay Nichole ng malaman ang balita. I just got engage and was so happy but this news flew to me. I drove three times faster than my usual driving just to get here immediately.

"Papa!"

I saw how both of them turned their disappointed look at me. Never in my entire life did my parents look at me the way they are looking right now. Ngayon lang.

Habol ko pa ang paghinga ko dahil sa pagtakbo pero pinilit kong kumalma.

"What do you think anak?" My mother said sadly.

I shook my head.

This is foolish! I want to get mad but while thinking about it, I just couldn't. Somehow I share the burden of guilt on her pain. Afterall, it is all because of me.

Tita Venice called me a while ago telling me what is happening to Madison. I can't help but be worried that is why I rushed all the way here to confirm it. I was fuming mad earlier. I wanted to punch anything and destroy something.

Mabilis kong tinalikuran ang aking mga magulang para magtungo sa garahe. Mabilis akong sumakay sa aking sasakyan at mabilis itong pinaharurot.

I can't think rationally.

I stormed in her room with a full load of anger. It made me more mad when I saw her sitting in her room all alone while crying.

I aggressively grabbed her arm. I can't control my anger anymore. I hate seeing her like this. She is wasting her life for me.

"What do you think are you doing with your life?" I shouted for her to wake up.

I tightened my hold and saw her winced in pain but still managed to smile. Mas lalo lamang nag init ang ulo ko. Ayan na naman siya sa mga ngiti niyang akala mo ay okay lang. Her face lit up when she saw me. She reached for my face but I shook it away.

"What the fuck are you doing with your life Madison!" I shouted again.

The dark circles around her eyes made me more mad. She's gotten so thin that I can't recognize her anymore. Magulo ang buhok at walang ayos sa katawan.

"Y-You're real.. you came for me." She said and smile.

"Are you crazy? Have you already lost your mind?"

I felt how she stiffened with my yell. She looked at me with fear in her eyes and was about to cry again but she managed to face me fiercefully.

"Why are you here?"

Looking at her like this pierced in my heart. I don't understand but it pains me. Lumamlam ang aking ekspresiyon ng lumayo siya sa akin at umiwas.

"Have you ever look at the mirror? Look at yourself! You.. you look like a complete mess."

"Bakit ka nandito? I heard you will be married? Kung nandito ka lang dahil pinakiusapan ka ng mga magulang ko ay umalis kana. I don't need your half hearted care. I don't need pity."

"Stop acting like a brat! Stop being so stubborn! Fix yourself and stop this nonsense drama."

My forehead creased when I heard her laugh.

"Ano bang alam mo? Ano bang alam mo sa nararamdaman ko? Stop telling me what to do dahil wala kang alam."

I pity her for being like this. She's given up on life. She looks lifeless that it almost made me beg her to stop loving me.

"Tell me what you need for you to stop acting like this."

"You can't give me what I need. Just leave me alone."