Loving the Ruthless Wave

Kabanata 17

Kabanata 17

Promise

"Apollo!"

Tumakbo ako para habulin siya. He is walking away from me. I tried to hold his arm but it drifted away.

"Don't leave. Apollo!"

Tumakbo ako ng mas mabilis para maabutan siya pero unti unti na siyang nawawala sa aking paningin.

I don't want him to go. I feel like if I lose him now, I will lose him forever. I don't want that. Never.

"Apollo!" I screamed his name, the loudest I can ever scream, but he never look back.

I lost the sight of him. I can't see him anymore.

Oh no! Please no!

Unti unti akong napa upo sa sahig. Unti unti ring pumatak ang aking mga luha. I closed my eyes tightly as I whimper in pain. Don't leave..

No! Not again!

But he was gone. He's gone.

I lose him.

"Please don't leave.." I whisperred underneath my breathe until all I can see is darkness.

Everything is black. I am scared. I don't know where to go. Not until I saw a star shining in the sky. I slowly get up as I followed the light it is giving. I walked for so long but I still continued. In the end of the darkness I was blinded by some lights. I walked my way at the end and there I saw my family, Arry and Rico reaching their hand for me.

They were smiling but I saw a glimpse of tears in their eyes. I slowly walked in their direction and reached for their hand. I closed my eyes and everything went black again..

I opened my eyes and all I saw was white. I tried to get up and I feet the throbbing pain inside my head. I feel my body aching.

Was it a dream? Nightmare perhaps, with a faint hope in the end.

What's happening? Where am I?

Sinubukan kong tumayo pero napadaing ako sa sobrang sakit ng aking katawan. I saw my right wrist with a dextrose. Sinubukan kong iangat ang aking kaliwang kamay. And there I saw a deep cut, still looking a bit fresh.

Napakunot ang aking noo.

And then I remembered everything. I tried to kill myself. Then why am I alive? I looked around all over the place. If I will base on the things in the room, the color and ambiance, plus this dextrose fixed on me, I can't be wrong. I am in the hospital.

Who brought me here? They should have just let me die there. I thought my suffering will stop. I thought everything will end. I don't want to cry all night just to be able to sleep. Those sleepless nights I spend are torture. I wanted to rest and sleep.

The door suddenly opened. I saw my Mom with widening eyes looking at me. She run towards my direction and embrace me, real hard.

"Ouch!"

Napadaing ako sa sakit. Pakiramdam ko ay nababali ang lahat ng buto sa aking katawan. My Mom let go and looked at me. Hinaplos niya ang aking pisngi.

"I'm sorry. Are you okay? How are you feeling baby?"

Hindi ako sumagot. I only looked at her blankly. I was shocked when she suddenly burst into tears.

I suddenly feel so guilty. I made my Mother cry. I am the worst. Hinaplos ko ang kaniyang buhok para aluhin siya sa pag iyak.

"D-Don't do that again. Don't try to leave Mommy again. Pour me all your pain but don't you ever try to end your life again."

Hindi ako nagsalita. I am lost for words. I don't know what to say. I am guilty.