This is my truth

33 Bond St.

I left my childhood apartment behind in an old Chevy Camaro. I watched my past get smaller and smaller in the passenger side mirror.
I'm not ready to talk about that yet though.
I wanna talk about my apartment.
3rd floor, high up.
There was a 3 story drop out my bedroom window. When I looked out my window I saw the apartment building next to mine. It was the exact same as my building but it had a totally different vibe. I never got to know anyone who lived in the building next to mine on the 3rd floor directly next to me.
But I waved hello to everyone who ever lived there! We had backyard parking and we shared a parking lot so we all used our back door more than the front door. I loved seeing my neighbors all out in the back yard! Once I had a neighbor directly downstairs from me who used to feed the pigeons and every morning I would go out onto the back porch & watch her feed the birds. I got to know her very well! Her name was Anna. She taught me how to play silent night on her organ & we made donuts together and she took me downtown on the bus once to eat Chinese food. She insisted that I wear a dress and be clean and neat! She taught me how ladies should behave. She made me get bangs cut in my hair because she hated seeing my hair hanging in my face. She made me stop beating up boys & stop hanging upside down on the fence at the back of our parking lot. She made me say please and thank you and made me walk in her living room straight & tall with a book on my head to fix my bad posture. The bad posture was due to 2 spinal defects that I was born with but we didn't know that at the time. One day I came home from a friend's house and when I turned down my driveway I saw an ambulance and her lying on a stretcher being wheeled to the ambulance! All of our neighbors were standing around watching the paramedics do their jobs with concerned looks on their faces! I ran to her and searched her face with silent panic in my heart! I couldn't make words come out of my mouth but she knew me very, very well & understood. She smiled and said "I'll be ok" and then she was gone! The ambulance took her away from me 💔Someone new moved in and she never came back. She had to go live in an assisted living apartment. I got to go visit her one time. My Mom took me ♥️ my mom loved anyone who loved me and Anna loved me! And I loved her so much too 😌 my mom loved her too. Now that I sit here and think about her and remember back to that time in my life I am sure that she was an angel. My mom's mental health was bad and I didn't have constant support from her. My Mom wanted to be there for me and she wanted the best for me but she couldn't even be there for herself. She truly appreciated the other people in our lives who were good to me. All she ever wanted was to feel better so she could be more. But she struggled desperately with her mental health and she relief heavily on me. Anna helped ease my burden by being there for me.
There was a metal pipe right outside my window. It went from the ground to the roof! I imagined climbing out my window and climbing down it to escape! I imagined how my feet would hit the ground and I'd run away before anyone knew I was gone! The pipe was way, way too small & close to the building to climb down! It wouldn't even be possible! But I grew up wishing that it was!
My bedroom closet was so small!
But I packed SO much stuff into it!
You couldn't open the door without things falling out of it!
My bedroom walls were the color of a pretty blue sky!
There were 3 doors in my bedroom, my parents bedroom door, my closet door and the door that led to the living room. You had to go through my bedroom to get to my parents bedroom. I grew up with no privacy in my bedroom. I didn't mind though because I didn't know any different! My mom taught me to always change my clothes in the bathroom. So it didn't really matter to me! I loved my apartment that I grew up in. I loved my bedroom. Even though the flat roof above my head was covered in black tar & it got as hot as hell in the summer!
I spent more than one night lying on my back on the back porch watching the bats fly because it was just too hot to sleep in my room.
I loved the bats 🦇🦇🦇
I loved being on my back porch.
I loved my life even though it was rough.
I loved living at 33 Bond Street.
The snapshots of my life in that apartment are so vivid in my mind.
In my memories I'm in the kitchen and my Mom and Dad are cooking and they're getting along!
My Mom is singing ♥️
And I am smiling from the inside out 💛