Boy meets Girl

Mom, Shawn, and I

My Dad was never there. He and my Mom fell out of love before I was born. I've never met him. All things I was told when I was young. Somehow I always felt it was my fault my Mom was alone.

Once I got older I thought about what my Dad would look like. I have green eyes and dirty blonde hair with tanned skin. So, it's kinda obvious my Dad's looks took effect on me.

When I was sixteen I developed my suspicions. One time I was at the park and I saw young Riley and Maya hanging out at the park with Shawn and Cory. They were taking photos for a family album. Shawn has just married Maya's mom. I remember hearing it from Lucas a few days later. They looked familiar, Cory and Shawn.

I remembered them from my baby album. I thought long and hard while sitting on that park bench. Mom was still in touch with Topanga. They went for coffee at least once every few months. But, the idea that she never talks about the other man puzzled me.

When I got home that night I realized we did look really similar. He has brown hair and I dirty blonde. Close to brown. He has blue eyes. I have green. I'm not as dark skinned as my mother so it would make since if my Dad was white.

  I just never thought it would be him. I've met him before; I've seen him before. And he belonged to her. Maya has the two things in the world I could ever want.

Lucas and My Dad.

My Mom looked down at the photo album and the backup at me. "Fine, you caught me." She said in defeat. I didn't think she'd actually admit it.

  My Dad has been near me for the past two years of my life. And I never knew, not really. "But," Mom started. I bent down and picked up the album. "He doesn't know you're his daughter." I gave my Mom a puzzled look. She looked over to her bed.

   Moments later we were sitting together looking at the photo of Shawn holding me when I was five months old. "I told him it was a one night stand with a man I don't remember." Mom said as I gazed at the photo. I was dressed in a stitched plaid gown and some frilly socks.

  "We had just gotten back from Sunday school." She says referring to the photo. I don't change the subject. "Why did you lie to him?" I asked. She took a deep breath. "We were young. And we were not together at the time. I didn't want him to be a father out of pressure."

So, I went my whole childhood without my biological Father because my Mother did not want to pressure him into loving us? Being with us?

"Why?" I asked. Mom placed her hand on my shoulder. My voice was shaky. I was shaking. "Why would you do this to me?" She came closer to me. To hug me. I didn't want her to touch me. I jumped off the bed and took the album with me.

   I slammed my bedroom door and locked it. I had my back against the door as a sank down to the floor. Tears rolled down my cheeks and I had trouble controlling my breathing. I could hear my Step Dad and Mom talking outside in the hall. There was a knock at the door.

  "Go away!" I shouted. I did not want a parental talk from Ricky. He and his ex wife Xiomara was because they just didn't work as a married couple. That's understandable. At least Roddi still had both parents in his life. I only had one, and she's the reason why.

  There's another knock. "Damnit I said go away!" I hit the door with my fist. I took deep breathes now. I could have had a normal family. A kind mother and a loving father.

  "Dilly, it's Roddi." Rodrick. Not Ricky. "May I come in?" He asked his voice quiet and soft. I stood up slowly and unlocked the door the album placed under my arm. Roddi took one look at me and hurried into the room. He locked the door behind him.

   "Angela and Dad were being kinda loud. Are you okay?" He asked taking the album from me. Am I okay? No. I'm not. I shook my head and Roddi wrapped me in a hug. I cried into his chest. "It's not fair." I mumbled.

   "I know." Roddi said rubbing my back. I pulled away and looked up at him. "You don't." I whispered. He frowned. "You have your Mom. Roddi, Xiomara loves you. She's there for you, all it takes is a phone call." He wraps me back into the hug. My voice was still shaky.

  When I finally calmed down, we both sat down on my bed. "You're right. My Mom is in my life. But I do understand because I've lived in two homes. I've had two birthdays and Christmases. I was just lucky my Dad met your Mom." Roddi looked down at my floor. He hates seeing people cry.

   "That's not the worst part Roddi.." I say whipping my cheeks. "He has a whole other family."

He looks at me a tear making its way down his cheek. "Life isn't fair Dylan." He takes out his phone and shows me a picture taken around twelve years ago. It's a picture of him, his mother, and two babies on a couch. He was six. I look back at him confused.

   "She has two other kids she sees every day. The twins. Rio, and Raquelle. They were born when I was six." Roddi turns his phone off and sighs. "They're twelve now. And it's hard to remember that my Mom has moved on from my Dad and I. But I live with that Dilly."

His Mom has two other kids. I never knew he had other siblings more less had to fight for attention. "It gets better. One day, everything will fall into place." Roddi shows me his lock screen. It's him and his Mom at his graduation.

My God, they look so happy. I want that. To be happy.

Roddi gets off the bed. "I'm surprised you let me in instead of crying to Lucas." He said putting his phone in his back pocket. He knows I hang out with Lucas, still?

  "Honestly, I didn't want to talk to anyone." I say messing with my hair. "Well, no matter what you always talk to him." Roddi's right. He's my safe place. I always cried on Lucas' shoulder. This.. this just seems too personal. What am I suppose to say?

Oh Lucas, your girlfriend and I, the person who is a major pain in my ass is also my sister. By marriage. Her mother married my Dad!

I fidgeted with my crop top. "You should call him." Roddi says walking to the door. I cross my arms. "Why are you suddenly okay with me talking to some guy?" I asked. Seems suspicious to me.

"He's not some guy," Roddi said unlocking the door and opening it. "He's your cowboy." I smile. My cowboy. Mine. "Call him." Roddi says before closing my door.

I'm too tired from all the crying so I go to bed without changing my clothes. This can wait for tomorrow. It seems that with Lucas and I, he'll always wait for me. A tear slips out while I drift off to sleep, but I'm not sad anymore. Not right now. Right now, I just want it to be tomorrow already.