Secret Sins & White Lies: Book One of the Sweet Rage Series

B13: Gian

SA PAYAPANG SPOT ng mag-inang Rose at Elise sa Puerto Galera, parang walang nabago. Walang ginalaw o pinakialaman sa mana sa simula si Rose, sa halip ay pinanatili ang shares na naka-invest sa negosyo ng mga Von Schiller at Verrazzano. My father became her financial adviser, pero ayon sa aking ama ay may sariling acumen si Rose sa pagpapalago ng pera. She was an Economics graduate, after all. They didn't think she would have survived the eccentric Fritz if she was not intelligent, wise and willful. Kinakausap lang nito si Dad when she was on the verge of making decisions para lang makumpirma ang mga impormasyong hindi nito hawak pa at iyon ang dahilan ng consultations, hindi ang tungkol sa pagdedesisyon nito. She would always have the last say.

When the owners of the hotel where she used to work and where she'd first met her late husband decided to migrate to Canada and offered to sell the property, she bought it out of the fruits of her investment. That started her hotelier career.

Rose's support group were friends she's had since highschool. Isa sa mga iyon si Jess, isang chef na nagtrabaho sa Dubai. Two days of arriving back home to surprise his girlfriend with a marriage proposal, the woman was found dead of multiple stabbings in her apartment.

Si Jess ang napagbintangan dahil nag-away ang dalawa nang huling nakitang buhay ang babae. Kasi, sa pag-uwi nang walang pasabi, nabisto nitong may affair ang nobya. Narinig ang ingay ng away ng mga kapitbahay. Ito ang naging primary suspect sa murder.

Nang makulong si Jess, Rose and the others regularly visited him to give him moral support because none of them believed he did it. Three years later, the real culprit was found out. It was the dead woman's stepbrother, also the secret lover, who'd committed the crime. She wanted to go back to Jess and was splitting with the other guy. Isang beses na nalasing, naikumpisal nito ang kasalanan sa mga kainuman. Ito ang nakulong at lumaya si Jess.

Pero hindi niyon maibabalik ang tatlong taong nawala kay Jess. Hindi madaling kalimutan na may mga naniwalang guilty ito o na nilayuan ito para hindi mabahiran ng stigma ng isang convict. Sa Puerto Galera ito nagtungo para makabawi. Nag-stay ito at nagtrabaho bilang chef sa restaurant ng remodeled at renamed na hotel ni Rose, ang The Fritzelise Resort Hotel. Doon nito hinanap ang bagong buhay. Elise was already six years old by then. A year later, nakasal sina Jess at Rose. Anna, Elise's half-sister, came a year later.

Pero hindi pa rin naging madali ang lahat. Gaya nga nang minsang kwento ni Elise, nanatiling naiinggit ang mga inggitera sa paganda nang pagandang buhay ni Rose. It was either the "mistress" stigma o pagiging asawa ng isang convict ang issue. There were those who wouldn't let go. Dahil hindi kaya si Rose, si Elise ang tumatanggap ng mga slurs. She learned early on about jealousy and hate before her mother could finally put a stop to it.

"Nahuli niya ako minsang umiiyak. When she asked me why, I told her it's because I look different. Pero sabi ko, kahit I look different basta siya ang nanay ko at ang tatay ko ang tatay ko at si Anna ang little sister ko, I don't mind, because they don't make me feel different. You know how our mothers' faces were like when you can't tell them nothing but the truth so help me God? Kaya sinabi ko tuloy na ganito kasi ang sinabi ni ganyan at ni ganito. Since then, ingat na ingat na ang mga relatives namin kapag napupunta kami sa Calapan.

"It's not that she stopped being a relative. When I grew up, I understand what was really going on. May pera si Inay. She loves helping people out. She gives them work or lend them something for small businesses that she enjoys helping them build up. Tapos kapag okay na, binibitiwan na niya. Kaya niyang i-tolerate ang mga plastic as long as magtatrabaho, pero hindi siya nagsasayang ng oras sa mga tamad. Sa pamilya ng mga iyon ako madalas makarinig ng slurs noong maliit pa ako kasi galit na galit sila kasi nga, ang damot daw ng nanay ko."

"That's how you learned to analyze startups? By watching her."

Tumango siya. "And I really ask questions. I was always curious. I've been excited about start-ups very early on."

Naiisip ko iyon ngayon habang umiiyak si Elise. How many times had she endured the stupid Schultzes? How could I not have seen that Shiela was jealous of her? How could I not have prevented her getting entangled again in the web of hate?

And now...

He should have known, with the Schultzes being German, that they would have a connection with the Lehmanns.

And with Emile Lehmann.

Lisette had probably told him about her fiancé's little ex-girlfriend who happened to be a Von Schiller protected by the Verrazzanos by now...

A ward by Giancarlo himself.

And I considered myself a good guardian? I should shoot myself.

Umupo ako sa tabi ni Elise at kinuha ko sa kamay niya ang baso ng alak bago iyon matapon. Ibinaba ko iyon sa coffee table saka ko siya hinila sa aking yakap.

"I'm so sorry," aniya. "I should have protected you better."

"Oh, Gian. Shut up," exasperated niyang sabi. "Ang tanga-tanga na nga ng tingin ko sa sarili ko tapos dadamay ka pa?" Tumulak siya at binawi ang baso at tinungga at inubos sa ilang lagok ang laman niyon habang nanonood ako, helpless, hoping I, too, could get drunk. Nag-uubo siya pagkatapos.

"Dahan-dahan. If you are planning to get drunk, you have all night."

"Hindi magbabago ang lasa kahit dahan-dahanin ko pa," katwiran niya, saka pinahid ng likod ng kamay ang bibig na basa at determinadong tumitig sa akin.

Kinabahan akong kung ano. "Don't look at me like that."

"I want to get drunk. Please? Can I?"

"Nagpapaalam ka ba?" sarkastiko kong tanong.

Lumabi ang mapupula niyang mga labi. "Baka isumbong mo ako kina Inay."

Pero nakatitig pa rin ako sa mga labing iyon. My body knew we were too close together on the sofa and it was feeling fuzzy all over. Iniwas ko ang mga mata ko. "You knew I had to tell them about what happened. You knew I had no choice."

Humawak ang kamay niya sa bisig ko. "Napatawad na kita. Okay? So. Can I get drunk?"

Tiningnan ko siya uli. "Only if supervised."

"Then supervise. 'Yon naman ang gusto mo, 'di ba? I want to get drunk, Gian! Galit ako! Gusto kong mag..."

"Vent?"

Tumango siya nang sunod-sunod.

I could smell her sweet scent because I was that close. Sa kabila ng mga pasa sa mukha niya ay nakikita pa rin ang ganda niya. Basa pa ang mga mata niya sa luha and those eyes were pleading at me. I was trying not to get lost in them that sometimes, I swear, could turn dark hazel whenever she got emotional.

But lost or not, I could do anything for her tonight. God forbid, she had been through enough.

"Go ahead," marahan kong sabi. "Pero hindi dito sa baba dahil kapag nakita ka ni Mommy—"

Mabilis pa sa alas-kwatro siyang nakatayo at nakatungo sa hagdan kung saan siya tumigil para bumaling sa akin. Lumilipad ang mahabang buhok niya sa ere na parang hair shampoo model. "Sa kwarto mo o sa kwarto ko?" paanas niyang tanong.

Shit... 

Natulala ako habang sumasalakay sa isip ko ang mga imahe na ni hindi ko nakontrol. My cock was suddenly hard as a rock. It was painful.

"Gian?" inip niyang tawag.

Hinagilap ko ang boses ko sa kung saan iyon nagtago. "Ah, sa... sa kwarto mo. Para kapag nalasing ka, malapit lang ang k-kama mo."

What the fuck...?!

Nagtataka niya akong tinitigan sandali na parang nakikita niyang mayroon akong pinagdaraanang mati—mabigat, bago siya tumalikod at nagpatuloy sa pag-akyat.

Iika-ika akong nagbalik sa bar para uminom nang mataas na shot ng whisky.