I'm shutting everyone out.
Shutting everything out.
I don't want any human interaction.
No communication.
I want to be alone.
By myself.
No one around.
No one to hurt me.
So I can't hurt no one.
So I can't say the wrong thing to someone.
So I can't do the wrong thing.
So I can't lash out of people.
So I can take a step back and just have room and time to breathe.
Room to have freedom.
Freedom from questions.
Freedom from socializing.
Freedom from communication.
Freedom from hurtful words.
Freedom from harmful actions.
All I can think about is alcohol.
Blades.
Pills.
A way out.
A way to end my suffering.
A way to be free from these feelings and thoughts.
A way to end my life without actually doing so.
I'm shutting down and no one can help me.
No medication.
No therapist.
No hospital.
Nothing helps.
I'm trying to help myself.
But it's not going as planned.
But I'm still waiting to make a move and go out with my plan.
We shall see how that goes.
