This is my fault.
I'm the reason why I'm where I'm at.
I fucked up.
Over and over and over again.
That's on me.
That's my fault.
That's all because of me.
I made those choices.
I made those stupid choices.
I want to talk.
I do.
But I feel like no one wants to listen to the stupid crap over and over again.
It gets old.
It gets annoying.
It becomes so stupid.
I'm scared.
I'm worried.
But no one seems to realize what I see and why I'm worried.
I can't expect them to.
I'm just at my very end point.
I'm tired.
I'm the problem.
I'm the reason why everyone is so curious as to what and why I'm doing something.
I'm the reason why I have no personal space.
I'm the reason everyone doesn't trust me.
My own mother doesn't trust me.
I'm the reason I'm on so many medicines.
I'm the reason why I have trust issues.
I'm the reason I have walls.
I'm the reason why people eventually leave.
I give them the key to the door and get mad when they leave and lock me in.
And that's my fault.
I gave them the power to do so.
And here I am stuck in the same position.
Giving people the power to do things and getting mad when they do.
I'm just so tired of this.
I'm honestly thinking about shutting down for a while and see what happens.
