Lavender

With All My Heart

I was lightly shook awake. As I opened my eyes, Adam was smiling at me. This bitch really wants me to trust him. No way. "What do you want?" I asked.

His smile didn't falter for a second, neither did the sincerity behind it.  "Breakfast?"

God, why does he smile at me like that. If I was stupid, I'd actually think he liked me. "I'm not hungry."

His eyes get a tad bit sadder. Good. Then the light sparks back up again. "Well, we could bring you something, we're already bringing food back for Luther, so it wouldn't be a hassle."

I made a show of rolling my eyes. "I would hate to be a hassle. You'd actually have to put in effort, and we wouldn't want that, now would we?"

Adam sighs. He stands back up and gives me one more quick smile before walking out the door with Max. 

I sighed and held my head in my hands. "I can see through you, you know," said a voice from across the room.

"Oh, you can, Luther? Well what do you see?" I shot back sarcastically. 

"Fear. Those few marks on your wrist. They come from someone pulling you harshly. Let me guess, abuse?"

I went slack jawed. I started to find a retort in my brain but before I could, Luther continued. 

"You keep changing tactics to push us away, which leads me to the conclusion that you're not actually mean, just scared. Scared of someone loving you. Because if we do, you'd have to come to terms with the fact that you deserve love, and that whoever hurt you was simply a bad person."

Tears started coming forward and a lump began forming in my throat. "Shut up."

Luther got out of the bed and walked to me. He crouched down to reach eye level with me sitting on the couch. "All you have to do is ask them. For whatever. For help, for sex, for space. And everything in between. Trust me, I was just like you when I first showed up here, and these guys are genuinely great people."

I looked him in the eye for the first time today. "Do you love them?"

Luther gave a small smile. "With all my heart."