Chapter 20

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Leo's P.O.V

"Raphael, please. Let me explain-"
"No! I trusted you! I believed you!"
"I didn't mean anything. Please-"
"get out of our planet, now!"
"Raphael, you do not understand-"
"JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE..!"
Standing behind the scene, I watched as they left with their spaceship. I sighed and stepped out of the shadows, walking towards my brother. He was just standing where he was, looking up at the night sky, clenching his fists.
"Raph..I'm sorry." He immediately collapsed to the ground, holding his head down. I walked over to his side and rubbed his back. I saw tears rolling down his face, then dropping on the ground. He punched the roof-ground hard with his right hand, creating cracks beneath it. "Damnit!" He hissed as he held back sobs.
There was no one there, other than me and him. He didn't want others to see him weak, except me; I already did once.
I hugged him tight, not wanting to let go. He didn't hug back, he didn't had the power to. Slowly, his hands made their way to my shell, also hugging me. I rubbed the back of his head gently as I whispered to his ear, "let's head back home now."

...

Laying on my bed and thinking about that night, I frowned. How could that freak Mona Lisa ever do that!? How could she!? Raph is a nice, strong, brave, protective, loyal, cute and handsome guy. How was she so blind!?
I got up from my bed, stretching out my arms and legs. It was hard to tell everyone this..situation. Anybody had their own reaction; Donnie was furious, shocked and horrified. Mikey was stunned with sadness and shock. Splinter was also furious and slightly shocked. April was beyond angry like she could snap over everything. Casey, immediately went to talk with Raph while he was shocked. The other mighty mutants were all mad, but Slash was the worst; he could've killed everyone if we didn't stop him. It showed how much they all cared for Raph, but he didn't seem to believe that.

I slowly made my way to the kitchen, looking down. It honestly broke me to see Raph, Who was always strong and solid, shatter. I guess everybody have their weak sides.
I sat at the coffee-table and took me seconds to realize Raph wasn't there.
I sighed and rested my head on the table, growling. "Hey leo." It was Mikey.
"Hey, Mike. Where's Raph?" He got silent, too silent. "his room, you know that." I looked up at him, he was frowning while opening the box of pizza. 'Oh Raph. Why do you have to go through all that pain?'
It was still bugging me. How could he go through all that trouble, all that pain and not show that? It's like he's the master of hiding it.
"Well, where's Donnie then?" He looked at me then took a bite out of his pizza. "He said he had his breakfast already, but i highly doubt it that so I gave him a small cake." he chuckled and took another bite.
Then it hit me. I had to question him what is going on between them. I could ask him because Donnie will probably come up with another excuse; and Mikey is bad at lying so I'll try him.
"Mikey? I had a question."
"Yes bro? Anything." He carelessly took another bite and chewed it.
"It's about between you and Donnie." He nearly chocked out while he looked at me nervously.
'That explains everything.' He nodded for me to continue, "Y-Yeah?" I took a deep breath, then started,
"Are you guys in a...relationship?" His eyes widened as he looked away. I could see sweat drops forming on his face. "W-W-Why do you ask that?" He mumbled while playing with his fingers.
I inhaled and spoke, "Mikey. When I was coming to the kitchen for breakfast, I saw you two having a 'secret' conversation."
Mikey gulped loudly as he gestured for me to continue. "Then, you told him that you loved him. I saw you guys kissing!"
He started to shake while bit his lips. "Mikey? Please." He sighed shakingly and looked down. "I guess there's no point in lying." he whispered to himself while he spoke up,
"Yes"
My eyes widened at this confirmation. I couldn't believe my ears. "Why?" he looked at me straight in the eyes, which gave me shivers. "Ever since we came back from that space mission, We both felt like we were meant to be. I tried to confess to him, but I was so scared he would reject me and think of me like a freak. I loved him, so much Leo You don't even know! But he didn't. He accepted and told me that he felt the same for years, he just didn't want to convince himself that."
My eyes were about to pop out. I just, I was shocked! All this months I didn't notice anything!
"B-But, isn't it illegal? We are brothers-"
"I was first afraid of that too, bro. But Donnie told me that we're not blood related and it doesn't matter. Sure, we grew up as brothers, but he said that doesn't matter!" He said cheerfully and proud.
"I still don't know about April thoug-"
"I..gotta go now." I stood up and left the kitchen.
"Wait, what about your breakfast!?" he yelled from the kitchen. "Thanks! I'm not hungry!" I yelled back and went straight to the dojo. I swung the door open and went in, seeing Sensei sitting on the ground with his legs crossed. Seems like he is waiting for us.
He hummed "I see you are early my son." I nodded and went in a exercise position. I brought my arms above my head, locking them as my legs divided open to a 180° condition.
I couldn't think properly. So, was it ok for me to have feelings for my brother? Wouldn't it be disgusting to some people? What would Splinter say!? Wait, do I really love him!?
"Leonardo?"
It took me seconds to realize I was laying on the ground. 'What the hell?' I sat straight and shook my head.
"Is something bothering you?" I shook my head hesitantly. "You can skip today's morning training, my dear."
"No Sensei. I'm alright. Was just thinking." he hummed then let it slip.
"very well. Are your brothers planning to train?"
"Mikey will. Same with Donnie. And Raph, well.." he frowned sadly.
"He may not be able to." "I understand."
He was about to talk when a voice interrupted him,
"I will train." We both turned to the dojo entrance, seeing a figure standing.
"If you guys think I won't for the reason what I think it is, then ya are wrong."
I looked at his face. He had bags under his eyes and his eyes were swollen. I frowned sadly.
"very well, my son. Go and wash your face." he just simply gave a small nod and left.
I sigh, "I knew it was a bad idea to trust them. Now for all I know, he can find trusting issues and it's all cause of that shyster-"
"Leonardo! That is not the language I want to see."

>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦<¦>¦

Well, the practice was a mess. First, I couldn't eye Mikey and Donnie. Second, Raph's situation was really awful. He was irritated more than usual. With a slight wrong act, We could've make him go angry and hot-head again, so none of us mocked him during the whole session.

"Hajime!" We all stopped and stood in front of sensei. "I saw improvements and since I am pleased, I will grant you with no training for the rest of the day." Mikey and Donnie exclaimed in joy and ran out. "Here we are, my dear project!"
When me and Raph stepped out of the dojo, he immediately walked to his room, but I wasn't letting it pass this time. As he was walking, I snuck from behind him. He opened his door and right when he wanted to close it, I put my foot in the slit of the empty space.

"Leo? What do ya want?" I pushed him in and closed the door behind me. A faint blush appeared on both of our cheeks when he spoke up. "What do ya want in my room?" I grabbed him and sat him on the bed, while sitting down myself.
"That's it Raph." he looked nervous.
"Now you have to tell me. What's wrong?" then his nervousness faded as he scoffed.

" 'What's wrong?' what's wrong!?" he got up the bed and stood up. "You know goddamn well what's wrong!" I stood up with him. "I know that! I want you to let it all out! I want to know what's going on your mind!"
He sneered again while his eyes became big as dinnerplates.
"Oh really!? Why's that?"
I growled and grabbed his shoulders. I smashed him into the wall, gripping his shoulders. He hissed in pain.
"Why do you always want to argue with me!? Why can't you just listen?"
"You think I like it when I fight with ya!?" My grips softened, so did my look.
"Then tell me. I care about you Raph-"
"it's not like you did before anyway!" He snapped with glossy eyes.
My eyes widened as I saw a tear split on his cheek. He pushed me back with all his strength. I trembled backwards.
"You never cared for me, so why do now!? And if you all did, was because you pitied me!"
His voice was decreased as he held his chest.
"Raph.."
He shook his head and wiped his tears away, but it had no use.
"No! Just, No! Just because something bad happened, doesn't mean you guys can pretend to care when you don't and never did!"

I was speechless. I literally couldn't find any sentences. His legs gave out and he collapsed to the wall behind him, sliding down.
"You never did, leo..you never did..!" he failed being strong and burst into crying silently, hugging his knees and burying his head in them.
I collapsed on my knees next to him, putting my hands on his thighs and feeling the scar left.
"Raph, I.." He shook his head.
"Don't try to say anything. It's useless." he said while his voice was muffled.
"Raph, I...I didn't knew you felt..this way."
"Yeah well, that's what all people say when they don't give a shit."
I glared at him sadly and touched his shoulders. "Raph. Why don't you just..let it all out?" he looked up at me. His eyes were glossy and red like his bandana.
He put his head back down, starting :
"whenever I want to, I can't. I feel useless. Like a coward that has no use. I'm weak Leo. So weak." I nodded for him to continue.
"just think about it Like I did a thousand times. In this team, I have the role of being nothing. Just a burden. Mikey is good at hyping us up and giving us energy. Donnie, he's the brain and without him we're doomed."
I was nervous when he wanted to talk about me so I bit my bottom lip and looked at him consciously.
"You? God, we would be nothing without you leo. You're the one who gives us hope and directs us to the right choices. The one who is capable of anything when he wants to."
I slightly blushed at that. He rarely gives compliments.
"Me?"
He sighed and looked up at me.
"I'm nothing. I'm just someone who screws everything up!" he stood up again while getting angry and angry.
"Like, did we even have a mission without me screwing up!? I don't remember one!" He was snapping once again.
"Raph! Don't say that!"
"you tell me, Leo! What am I to this team? Or not even a team, this family!? I'm just repeatedly making you guys mad, sad or disappointed! Why am I even living anymore!?"

His last sentence did it. I couldn't hold my feelings in anymore as I stood up. dashing towards him and grabbing him, I felt myself crashing my lips onto his...

...

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