ATEEZ HEIST [18+ Yunho/Mingi Fanfic]

Chapter 38 - Jongho

After Hongjoong left, everyone became pretty quiet. They weren't really all that sad, there was just more of a heavy feeling that developed in the apartment. A mutual feeling of uncertainty and anxiety. Seonghwa, being the considerate man that he always was, offered to order whatever takeout food they wanted for dinner. He usually preferred that they eat healthier, but he could tell that today, everyone needed cheering up more than anything. When Yeosang immediately suggested fried chicken, nobody disagreed, so the oldest took out his phone to place the order.

I went to sit next to Yunho on the couch while we waited for the food to arrive, but just before I could, I noticed Jongho sulking away towards his room. I figured that after what he did to Hongjoong, he deserved a "thank you" at the very least. It felt odd to get up and follow him to his room, as I was so used to avoiding him.

"Hey," I announced myself as I knocked on his already-open door.

"Oh. What do you want?" He was propped up on his bed, holding his left hand up and carefully studying the bruises that now lined his knuckles. He brushed over one of them and winced.

"Is your hand okay? I can get you some ice if you want." I asked from the doorway, leaning in to try and get a better look at his hand.

He shook his head softly. "It's fine, I've had worse."

Eventually he looked up at me with somber eyes. "Did you need something?"

"Um, I just wanted to say thanks. You know, for earlier." I moved my weight from one foot to the other. "I know you didn't do it for me, but still, it was nice that you're protective of everyone."

"Right..." He muttered, staring back down at his knuckles.

I had said what I had wanted to say, but something prevented me from leaving. He was acting strange. Never once had I had a full conversation with Jongho without him insulting me.

"Are you doing okay?" I asked him, my inquisitive tone grabbing his attention once again. "You just seem a little down..."

"I'm fine." He responded quickly.

"Are you sure..." I started.

"I said that I'm fine Y/N! Can't you just leave me alone?" He suddenly snapped at me. Through his shouting, there was a trembling in his voice. I could tell he was holding back a waterfall of emotions. Still, if he didn't want to talk about it, there was nothing more that I could do.

"I'm sorry. I'll go." I said, turning away from the room.

Suddenly, I heard his quiet voice call out. "Wait..."

He motioned for me to come back in, so I sat down on his desk chair.

"I'm sorry, I just... you shouldn't thank me for what I did to Hongjoong." He mumbled.

I tilted my head curiously, "Why not?"

"Because I only did it because I got angry. That's what I do. I get angry and I snap, and people get hurt because of me." His voice was so quiet that I could barely hear him. "I'm not a good person Y/N. You shouldn't thank me."

"But you were just protecting us. Sure, you didn't have to punch him, but I don't think he'll come back now. You're keeping us safe." I countered. Usually, I wouldn't have tried to make him feel better, but seeing him in this state was heartbreaking. I hadn't seen this kind of emotion from him before.

He shook his head, refusing to believe me. "No, you don't get it. When I punched Hongjoong, I wasn't thinking about any of you. The asshole just made me angry and the next thing I knew, he was lying on the floor. I've always been angry and I always will be. That's the way I am, just like my father."

"Your father?"

The shifted his weight back and forth while staring down at his carpet. "He was always angry too. Always yelling insults and violent. At first it was rare. He would hit my mom and I could never do anything about it because I was too young. Once I got older, I started to step in to take most of the beatings, to protect my mother from him. It happened more often...almost daily..."

Jongho's voice began to break. I glanced over and noticed his eyes glistening as he continued, "Everyday I would ask my mom to leave him, but she always refused. So, on my sixteenth birthday, I left by myself. I dropped out of school, and went to work in a factory. Last year I found out from an old friend that he had died after getting drunk and driving into a guardrail on the highway. Fitting way for him to go out, I guess."

"I'm sorry that all happened to you." I said softly, suddenly feeling very fortunate about my family in comparison. I couldn't imagine what dealing with all those years of abuse could do to a person. "But Jongho, you aren't him."

"I am though. I've never been able to control my anger. I'm just like him. You should know, I'm meaner to you than anyone else."

"You've had to go through a lot, and yeah, maybe you aren't always the nicest. But you helped to keep us all safe when it mattered the most." I explained carefully. "Your father was a real monster but you aren't one. You're your own person, and I can tell that you have a good heart."

"I do?" He asked. I could tell that a couple tears had run down his puffy cheeks as I had been talking. He finally managed to bring his gaze up to mine, awaiting my response.

"The fact that you're worried about all of this means that you want to be good. A real monster wouldn't care at all." I smiled at him. "I know that you're a good person Jongho, and no one can convince me otherwise."

He smiled back softly. "Thanks Y/N..."

I rose up to my feet. "Now come on, I think dinner will be here soon."

"I don't know, I'm not that hungry. I think I'll just stay here." He mumbled, going to curl up on his bed.

"But it's fried chicken." I disclosed, raising an eyebrow at him.

He sat up again, eyes suddenly brightening, "Oh... I like fried chicken."

Changing his mind, he got up off the mattress and went to follow me out the door. But before he could, I turned quickly and wrapped my arms around him, squeezing him tightly. He stood stiff as a board.

"Y/N, what are you doing?"

"Shut up, you needed a hug." I grinned. From now on I decided that I was going to be his friend, whether he liked it or not.

"But I don't like hugs." He muttered, still refusing to hug me back.

"Too bad."

I love Jongho so much oml, look at himmmm. MY BABY BOI <3