Nightmares

Chapter twenty-six: Harper

I went out for a run early the next morning. Headphones in and music turned up, I was able to block out the world. The park was quiet. Needing to clear my mind of thoughts, so I could make rational decisions. I thought about him.

Thought about the way he'd screwed me over. The way he had picked at me until there was nothing left. I wondered why I'd had to mean so little to him. Why had he thought that I was insignificant enough to play with my heart and throw it away? I never gave him a good enough reason to stay.

But the question was: would Carter stay? Was he ready to see what hides beneath the surface? If cracks show up in my life, will he do the right job and hold them together? Or will he smash me to pieces like he did? I guess I was scared of what would happen if I let anyone too close. I needed to be careful.

Because pretty faces didn't always have pretty hearts.

~*~

Arriving home later, Carlos was waiting for me. His eyes lit up when he saw me, and he made a beeline for me and wrapped his arms around me in a hug.

"Harpy!" He said happily.

"Hey buddy." I told him, removing my earphones.

"Will you play with me?" He asked, looking up at me with big eyes.

"Of course. You set up a game, and I'll go and have a shower." I told him.

He smiled and went to set up Frustration. I trudged up the stairs and removed my sticky clothing, showering and changing into something new. Sitting on the floor with Carlos, we played a few games of Frustration before my phone rang. Picking it up, I smiled when I saw Carter's name.

"Hi." I told him, as Carlos had his turn.

"Hey." He said. "What are you doing right now?"

"Playing Frustration with my brother, why?"

"I finish work at three, want to meet me?"

"What about Carlos?"

"He can come too." He said, casually. "I was just going for a walk in the park. We could go to the swings."

I smiled at the mention of the swings.

"I'll see you there." I told him.

"Who was that?" My brother asked as I moved my piece three places.

"Carter."

He looked at my happy face, puzzled.

"He's the boy I met a while ago. Remember?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"What did he want?" He asked.

"He wanted to meet at the park." I told him.

His eyes lit up, "The park? Can I come?"

I chuckled. "Of course, little man."

"When are we going?"

"Soon." I told him. "Let's finish this game first."

~*~

"Come on, Carlos. We're going to be late." I told him as he put his shoe on.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." He said, standing up.

I laughed and ruffled his hair.

"Don't touch my hair." He complained, ducking away.

I smiled and took his hand, walking down the drive, Carlos squeezed my hand.

"Can we go on the swings?" He asked.

"Of course."

"And the slide?"

"Yes."

"And have ice-cream?" He asked eagerly.

"Is it a trip to the park if we don't?" I teased.

He smiled and skipped alongside me.

Arriving at the park, we — well, mostly I — looked around trying to find Carter. He was leaning against a tree, smoking a cigarette, which he put out the minute he saw I had company.

"Hey." I said, smiling.

"Hey." He threw his cigarette butt onto the grass and ground it under his foot to put it out.

"Carter, this is my little brother, Carlos." I told him, gesturing to my brother, who looked at Carter in adoration. I smiled at him.

"Hey buddy." He said. "Want an ice-cream?"

"Yeah!" Carlos replied.

I chuckled. "Maybe go on the swings first or else you'll be sick once you've eaten your ice-cream." I told him.

With a smile, we walked to the swings where he got on and tried to kick.

"Push me, Harper!" He said.

Smiling, I went behind and pushed him, talking to Carter as I did so.

"So how have you been?" I asked.

"Alright." He replied. Watching Carlos in the sky. "I've just been working, since college is out for the week."

"Where do you work?"

"In a café downtown." He told me.

I hummed in response.

Carlos started clamouring to get down, so I slowed the swing and he hopped off, grabbing Carter's leg to steady himself. Me and Carter shared another smile.

"Is it ice-cream time now?" He asked.

I chuckled. "You bet, little man."

Heading to the ice-cream van, I got Carlos a caramel ice-cream and myself a vanilla. Carter got a mint. Walking along, we ate our ice-cream, talking a little but just enjoying the evening sun. It was a pretty perfect day.

"Thanks for an amazing day." I told Carter as we reached the park gates, I held my brother's hand and he smiled politely at Carter.

"You're welcome. We should come again soon." He suggested.

I smiled. "That would be nice."

"See you soon then, okay?" He said. "Let me know when you get home?"

"Okay. Stay safe. Speak soon." I told him.

Me and Carlos gave him a wave as we walked off.

"I like him." Carlos said as we headed home.

I smiled. "I do too." I told him.

"He loves you." He said, almost absently.

"He what?"

"He loves you." He said again. "And what's more, I think you love him back."

"Do I?" I asked.

"Uh-huh." He said like I was stupid for even asking.

I was quiet the rest of the journey home. Thinking over his words.

Was it true? Did I really love him?

I thought I was too scared to fall in love. I thought I was too broken.

Maybe I don't know as much as I thought I did.