Freaky Thoughts

Before I let you go

I stared at my reflection as I fixed my clothes.

It's been a week and bags under my eyes are now visible from those sleepless nights.

I sighed. I better get going.

I did one final look then went out of my room.

Napatigil na naman ako at pinagmasdan ang buong bahay ko na dating puno ng buhay at ingay.

I can still remember yesterday
We were so in love in a special way
And knowing that your love
Made me feel... Oh... So right

I can remember how she always tries to wake me up whenever I fall asleep on the couch.

Or when I vomited on the carpet, I had an earful the next morning from her.

Or when I asked her to be my girlfriend here, in this very room.

I probably should get a new place after this.

After a few moments, I decided to really get going.

Tatlumpong minuto bago ang usapan namin na magkikita at andito na ako sa lugar kung saan nagumpisa ang lahat.

Ilang minuto pa ay dumating siya.

We are sitting at the both end of the bench.

"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?" she asked as she looked straight ahead.

"Yes."

I can see in my peripheral view on how fast her head turned to me.

"Why? What happened to us?"

But now I feel lost
Don't know what to do
Each and everyday I think of you
Holdin' back the tears
I'm trying with all my might

I stood up and walked a few steps ahead and stared at the sea.

I took a deep breath, "T-There's . . ." I gulped "T-There's s-someon--" may humila sa balikat at dumapo ang palad niya sa pisngi ko.

"So that's it?! Because you found someone? You freakin' cheated on me?!"

"I'm s-sorry."

"I can't believe you. May mali ba sakin? May kulang? Nakakasawa na kasi yung ganito."

"No, nothing is wrong with you okay? Ako, kami. Kami yung may mali." I tried to reach her but she moved away.

"Please don't." she wiped her tears "Pinaglaban kita sa Daddy ko. Sumugal ako sayo dahil naniwala ako sa pagmamahal mo."

"M-maniwala ka, m-mahal kita."

"No, you don't. Cause if you do, you wouldn't do this to me." and with that, she turned around and walked away.

Because you've gone and left me
Standin' all alone
And I know I've got to face
Tomorrow on my own
But baby

"I hurt her. But I did for her." I told my friend.

"I know. The intention was good but the way you executed it, dun ka sumabit."

"That is her dream, I can't take that away from her."

"Still, that is not your decision to make."

"But that's her dream . . . It's important. It will make her happy."

"You see, sa sobrang pagaalala natin sa mga taong mahal natin. May mga bagay tayong nagagawa na hindi natin namamalayan na nakakasakit na tayo. Yes, magiging masaya siya pag natupad na ang pangarap niya pero she knows, she will be happier with you beside her. That's what you took away from her, from you. Hindi mo siya binigyan ng pagkakataon na magdesisyon para sa sarili niya."

"Hindi mo binigyan ng pagkakataon ang sarili mong maging masaya."

"B-but what if she regretted her decision? Choosing me?"

"Then you should make sure she did the right thing. Choosing you is one hell of a risk, make sure you're worthy of it."

Cause letting love go is never easy
But I love you so
That's why I set you free
I know someday, somehow
I'll find a way
To leave it all behind me
Guess it wasn't meant to be my baby

So before I let you go
I want to say...
So before I let you go
I want to say...

I love you…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

'Cause sometimes, love also means letting go.

Thank you for reading!