In Another Life

163

 "Sorry." he replied. I nodded. "It's okay. Thank you for not letting me eat concrete," I joked. He laughed a little and looked back up to meet my gaze. "I guess some things never change huh?" I folded my lips inside my mouth, thinking of all the times that he had kept me from falling, or the amount of times that I had run into him. That's how we had met even. Because I ran into him. I flushed a little thinking back to that time when I couldn't stop embarrassing myself. "So, how've you been?" he asked, staring at me. Damn, could he get those intense blue eyes off of me? I couldn't think when they were focused on me like that. That should be illegal. Coercion by eyes. I kind of narrowed my eyes at him. "How've I been? That's the first thing you ask me?" I replied, realizing that my voice was kind of angry. He looked sheepish again and ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know what to say really T. I never expected to see you here. This is a shock for me. I didn't even know  you were in LA. Do you realize how seeing you, of all people, in that club affected me?" I was confused. "Brennen didn't tell you that I moved to LA? He and Sarah have been hanging out a lot lately. I assumed he would have told you." He shook his head. "No, he didn't tell me. When we first..." he bit his lip, staring at me. "When we first split, I asked everyone to stop saying your name. I couldn't deal with it. I guess, after a while, they just never mentioned you to me anymore. That's probably why he didn't say anything. I knew that Sarah was here, but I just thought she had moved here. To work on getting an acting gig or something." I didn't reply. His eyes were beginning to be too overpowering, so I dragged my gaze away from him. Instead, I looked back towards the group. Justin was watching me, his eyes narrowed. "Well, um, it's good to see you. I've...I've missed you T," Colby said quietly. I looked back to him, and saw the sadness in his blue eyes. Damn it, why did he have to do this to me?! "You've missed me?" I asked, still angry. Why was I angry? "It's been three years and I haven't heard from you at all! Do you realize what I've been through since we 'split' as you called it?" He looked shocked by my anger and honestly, I was a little shocked too. I hadn't realized that I was angry with him. I shouldn't be. It was irrational. We had both agreed to not be in a relationship, because of the distance, but I had never really wanted to end things. I guess I sort of blamed him for my drug addiction. I knew that I shouldn't, but I couldn't help it. I had wanted him to save me from myself. I had wanted him to know that I needed him. Maybe that's why I got into them in the first place. Not only to forget, but to try and get him to come back to me, if he knew how much trouble I was in. Only he didn't. Because, he hadn't known. No one had told him anything. "Terra, I'm sorry. I thought the break was what we both wanted, because we knew it couldn't work. A clean break, with no contact. Do you know how hard that was for me? To see you, in your Insta stories, with all of those other guys?! I..." His voice trailed off, as he looked down and twisted his rings. "I couldn't bear the thought of you so I asked everyone not to speak of you. Maybe I shouldn't have done that, but I...I wasn't strong enough to deal with the memory of you so I blocked it out. I turned to drinking for a little while. I stayed in bed, with a bottle of Jack by my side for a couple of months. Sam finally knocked some sense into me, and pulled me back. It wasn't easy to leave you. It never became easier, and I never forgot you. I just couldn't allow myself to think of you." He looked back up at me, stealing my breath. "I don't know what to say," he replied. I let out a long slow breath and looked down at my feet. These damn heels were starting to kill me. "Colby, I couldn't bear the thought of you either. I get it," I replied, looking back up at him. "I'm sorry that I sounded angry. I just...I don't think I know how to deal with seeing you. This night is unbelievable." He nodded, then glanced over to Justin, then back to me. "I see you and Justin are together. You seem happy with him. I'm glad. That's all I ever wanted for you Terra. For you to be happy." Aw fuck, he was stealing my heart again. I could feel it, just trying to hand itself to him freely. Kind of fucked up, when I thought it had already given itself to Justin. Cheating ass heart. "Yeah. I'm happy. You seem happy too...with Kelly, or whatever her name was. I'm going to be honest though, I never did see you with someone like her. She's gorgeous, but too ordinary. She looks just like any other LA Insta model. No offense," I replied, trying to keep my voice light. He smirked at me for just a second. "Her name is Kira. She's not an Insta model. She's actually about to graduate from a school for fashion designing. She wants to make her own fashion line. She's actually really good at it. Her designs are more my style than hers. Maybe more of what your style used to be." He let his eyes roam over me, taking in my little blue dress. Again I felt naked. "I admit that she is a little more basic than I thought that I would end up with but she's great," he finished, meeting my eyes again. I nodded, not really knowing what to say. "Why did you run off Terra? In the club? If there isn't anything between us, why did you do that?" he asked me, his voice getting deeper.