In Another Life

174 Colby's POV

She didn't wait, and I was sure that I had lost her by the time I got outside. Until I saw her walking a little ways ahead down the sidewalk. "Terra!" I called again, running towards her. "No Colby. Just please leave me alone. This isn't right. We aren't right. You're not good for me," she said, her voice cracking. I could tell that she was really crying now, even though she kept her face hidden from me, as she slowed to a stop. I grabbed her and pulled her against me, letting her cry it out. I stroked her hair as she pretty much just sobbed into my shirt. "Baby Girl, I'm so so sorry. I didn't know. I would have never left. I don't what I would've done, but I would've figured it out," I said, my own voice cracking. My heart was broken, for her and for myself. I felt like total shit, knowing that I had left her in that mess. That I hadn't come to save her. She only sobbed harder, letting me console her. I'm not sure how long we stood on the sidewalk like that, her in my arms, me gently stroking her hair, and rubbing her back. Her sobs soons quieted, and eventually stopped. She pulled back from me and I let her. She swiped her hand across her face, catching the stray tears that were there. "I don't know what to do," she whimpered, meeting my gaze. "That's okay," I replied. I wasn't going to push a decision out of her. That wasn't right and apparently, I had put her through enough. Without even knowing it. As much as I didn't like Justin, I had a new found respect for him now. I hated that. "You take all the time you need. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere," I replied softly, reaching up and pushing her hair behind her ear, then cupping her face. "I love you Terra. It's always been you. I understand if you don't feel that way anymore. I get it. Justin was your knight in shining armor. I'm the one that triggered your relapse. I honestly wouldn't blame  you if really never wanted to see me again. But I want you to think about it. Take your time and really think about it. She was staring up at me, her eyes red and glassy from crying, her cheeks pink and tear streaked. Her bottom lip was swollen because she wouldn't stop biting it. I wanted to kiss her. God, I wanted to kiss her so badly. But I wouldn't make that move. That would have to be on her. I would never force- At that moment, she rose up on her tip toes and pressed her lips to mine, intertwining her hands around my neck. My hands went to her waist, almost picking her up, as I held her against me. Her lips were like a fine wine, sweet, with a hint of bitter. The bitter being that I didn't know what this meant. Was this goodbye? It didn't matter right now. Right now, the only thing that mattered was that she was in my arms. I tightened my grip on her hips, then pushed her back into the brick wall that was behind us. She only moaned and opened her mouth to me. My hands roamed her body, trying to see if my memory did me justice. It didn't. This was so much more than a memory could ever give me. Her hands fell to my back and she started digging her nails in, pulling her self closer, as I let my tongue delve deeper. I wanted more. I needed it. I poured every ounce of love that I had for her into this kiss, and felt her do the same. I let my hands trail under her hoodie and up her naked back, digging my fingers into her soft skin. The little noises that she let out, the little mewls and moans, I swallowed every one, catching them on my tongue. Everything was like I remembered. Her response to me was automatic. The way her body felt under my hands was electric. I shoved my my hips against hers, letting her feel what she was doing to me, making her gasp. We broke the kiss, breathing heavily, and staring into each other's eyes. For a moment, neither of us spoke. It was just us, no one else, just us. She swallowed hard, and I smiled softly down at her, not speaking. "Um, I should go," she said finally. I felt my heart fall to my feet. She was going back to him. "You're going back to Justin," I replied, making it a statement. She looked at me sadly but with determination, and nodded. "I am. It's my home. He's my home. I just cheated on him and I feel like shit about it. I think that I can't help myself around you. There's just something..I don't know Colby. You're like my drug and I have to give you up. If I don't, I'm just going to relapse." She stepped closer to me and put her hand on my cheek. "You deserve better than me," she said softly, before pressing her lips gently to mine for a second. I grabbed her arms, forcing her to stand still against me for just another moment longer. "I don't Terra. I don't deserve you at all. But I love you. More than I have loved anyone in my entire life. I'll prove that to you, if you let me. Just don't shut me out. Please," I begged, hearing my own voice crack as I stared down in those aqua eyes that were starting to haunt me. She blinked, letting a couple of tears escape her eyes, before smiling back at me. Only her smile looked sad. "I think I love you too Colby. I probably always have. But I'm with Justin. Please understand," she replied back, her voice soft, and resigned. She meant what she was saying. She was going back to him. She turned away from me and started to walk off. "Hey where are you going? Didn't you drive here?" She looked back and nodded, then held her hands up as she walked backwards. "No money," she said, laughing a little, before turning back around. Another memory of her walking backwards popped into my head.