In Another Life

193

"You promise? YOU PROMISE? What good does that do to me Terra? You just sat there and LIED TO MY FACE ABOUT WHO YOU TEXTED! Your promises mean nothing." The way he looked at me just then had me shrinking back against the door frame. The rage in his eyes was unlike anything I had ever seen. It was like I could see actual flames coming out of them, filled with hate and disgust. He had never, ever, looked at me like that, and I hated it. It made me hate myself for turning this person who was such a sweet soul into something like this. He deserved so much better than me. I felt my eyes fill with tears, from both his words, and the fear I had from watching cars basically jump out of his way as he tried to speed through LA traffic. "J, I swear I'm not lying! I didn't sleep with him! I wouldn't do that to you, EVER!" It seemed like he was going even faster, taking the curves and turns at top speed so that I slammed one way, and then the other. I was definitely going to have bruises. "I don't believe a word you say anymore T. Not a single word. How long have you been talking to him? Was that night at the club even the first night that you've seen him since we've lived here?!" His voice had grown cold, no longer yelling, but cold as ice. "YES," I yelled at him, closing my eyes as he took another hairpin turn. We were out of the city now, on a road that I didn't recognize. "I can see that. Unless you've deleted some of these messages. I can also see him professing his love for you and you saying 'okay, let's meet.'" I opened my eyes and met his hard green ones, not recognizing them at all. He was still scrolling through my phone to the very first text that Colby and I had sent. I wasn't okay with this. That was my personal property, my personal business. I didn't care if we were together, or what he thought, he had no right to dig into t hat. I held my hand out, and tried to speak with authority in my voice. "Give me my phone Justin. You have no right to snoop through it." He glanced at me again, then back to the road, and rolled his eyes. "Really? I have no right? How long did I support you Terra? How long did I spend all of my money on  you, because you couldn't find work? And let's not forget how much your rehab costed, or the time I spent taking care of you and helping you get past your sick phase. I DON'T DESERVE THIS TERRA!" He yelled at me, and closed his fist around my phone. I thought that he would crack it from the sheer force he was putting around it. "I know you don't Justin. I KNOW! AND I'M SORRY! Please just stop the car and let me out. I'll walk back, give you time to cool off." "Oh shut up Terra, I know how to drive," he replied exasperatedly as he took yet another curve at high speeds. "Why have you been lying to me?" he asked, his voice calm but sad now. He was still driving super fast though and I was honestly scared. "I don't know Justin. I just didn't want you to get upset because I know how you used to feel about him, how you probably still do. I know you think Colby is a threat but-" He started laughing again, and cut me off. "He is a threat T. Colby is the biggest threat that our relationship has ever been through. I don't know if we are going to be able to make it through this T. I don't know that I trust you anymore." My only reply was the sniffing and gasping for breath from my heavy crying. I had turned my head away from him, so that he couldn't see how upset I was. I hated crying. It made me feel weak and not in control. "I need you tell me the truth. About everything. I need to know what happened between you two that night, because you haven't been the same since." I shook my head, and opened my mouth, about to deny, to lie yet again, that anything had happened between us, but the look in his eyes stopped me. He was begging me not to lie to him again. I had to tell him. "Okay," I sighed. He looked back at the road and stiffened his body like he was preparing himself for bad news. "We kissed," I finally admitted, bracing my own body for his reaction. Just as I suspected, he got mad again. "What the FUCK T? I KNEW he was bad news and that he was going to try some slick shit like that. Fucking pretty LA boy, thinks just because people know his name that he can put his hands on anyone he wants too. Well, I've got news for him, I-" I cut his rant off. "He didn't kiss me Justin! I kissed him." We were still going entirely too fast, but I was almost not even paying attention to the speed anymore. I was watching Justin's face. His mouth fell open, as he turned to look at me. "You-?" I nodded at him, and bit my lip as I saw the hurt cross his face. "Why?" he asked. "Because I-" A loud horn blew, snatching my attention to the outside world that still seemed to exist in the middle of my life falling apart. Justin and I both jerked our heads to the front, staring out the windshield at the semi truck headed straight for us. Justin had veered off into the other lane, facing oncoming traffic, and neither of us had noticed. He jerked the wheel hard, surprise and fear getting the best of him. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion then. The car started spinning out of control, and everything around me was a blur. I grabbed ahold of the bar above my head again, and squeezed my eyes shut. My stomach was flipping and turning with the motion of the car. I heard someone scream. Maybe it was me. There was a loud crunching sound, then everything went silent.