She's so Mean(A Harry Styles fanfic)

He (A Poem at 1am)

(no relevance to the story, just something I wrote I wanted to share)

I had imagined you completely different,

built you up in my mind as who I wanted you to be

not as how you stood looking at me in your faded ripped jeans

and torn shirt

the boy in the back of my mind

flickering behind the back of my eyelids as I fell asleep

he was happy

the frown on your face upturned

the scars on you wrist hidden

beneath the long sleeves of your shirt

creating the illusion that

he was happy

you had me from hello

those big brown eyes

and those dimples that sat upon your cheeks

your hair falling so effortlessly past your shoulders

messed around as if you shouldn't care

and you don't

What did I ever do to deserve you?

because your hand pressed so delicately against my skin, bare

made me feel for once in my life like

I was happy

and oh my god

playing pretend with you

I would do it all over again

if I could see that smile spread across your face

and light up the room

with those familiar indents carved into your cheeks

and I don't hate you for lying to me

for smiling and lauging and being happy

when you were losing your mind

falling apart in front of me

your head running cycles as you spiraled downward

into dark places;

contemplation of suicide

but if I could picture you any one way

it would be standing in front of me

in your faded ripped jeans

and torn shirt

happy.