Killer Soulmate/Bakudeku

Chapter 11

Midoriya POV

I was still pretty shaken up when I heard the news. I'm still pretty confused about everything. I mean, how did I kill someone and not even remember? Everyone else I've killed I've remembered killing. But this time, a random kid, who I don't know or anything, got killed and I had no idea. What if I were to get caught? Would I have just woken up in cell and not know what happened? And the most important question: Has it been that voice in my head that was controlling me all along? What if it was never really me. . . What if it was just him using me like a puppet? Ugh, I'm not sure of anything anymore. I'm just glad I didn't get caught, but. . . I also feel kinda guilty for killing some random person. The thing is. . . I've never felt guilty for killing someone before, so, why now?

"Hey mom, I'm going to school now, bye! Love you!" I yelled to my mom while opening the door.

"Okay Izuku! I love you too!" She yelled back from the kitchen.

I went out the door and closed it. I adjusted my bag on my shoulders and continued to walk to school. I wasn't really in the mood for coffee. I wasn't even hungry. I never ate breakfast this morning, I hadn't had anything to drink either. Yet, I just feel nothing. . . but, I also feel like I could puke my heart out. I really am not enjoying my morning right now.

I got to school pretty early, which is a first. It's probably because I fast-walked the entire time. People say when you're stressed you tend to walk really fast. And let's be honest, I was wayyy beyond stressed. I was feeling a lot of things.

I wanted to scream.

I wanted to get out.

I wanted leave.

I wanted to puke.

I wanted to cry.

I wanted to pretend.

I wanted to feel the pain.

I wanted the pain to go away.

I wanted others to feel my pain.

I wanted to be alone.

I wanted to be hugged.

I wanted to loved.

I wanted to be hated.

I wanted the world to be at peace.

. . .

. . .

. . .

I don't think it can be like that if I'm still here.

I sat down in my seat and lay my head down.

Can I be a hero if I feel all of these emotions?

Who am I kidding? I can never be a real hero.

I've killed people. I hurt others. Emotionally and physically. I can pretend to be a hero. I can pretend to smile in the face of danger. I can pretend to be happy. . . I've done it all my life so this shouldn't be any different.

But then there's that option. . .

I could just disappear. Forever. See what the afterlife is really like. . . I can write a note saying I'm the Green Reaper. Then they won't feel sad that I died. . .

. . .

Right?

"Ugh. I can't even see your face and I can already tell you're depressed. What the hell happened? You're never upset, or early."

I jumped at the voice, slightly shocked that he sounded worried.

Shinso POV

I walked in the classroom.

Ah just in time. There's still about 15 minutes until people start arriving. I'll just-

My thoughts were interrupted when I saw green hair laying on the desk to the left of mine.

Why is he here so early? He usually comes in when there's 10 minutes until class starts, which is 10 minutes after me. There's 20 minutes until class starts, so. . . why?

Just by the looks of him, he seemed to radiate sadness. Anger, even.

"Ugh. I can't even see your face and I can already tell you're depressed. What the hell happened? You're never upset, or early." I saw him flinch slightly at the sound of my voice.

Of course he's probably surprised. All I ever do is try and push him away. I hope he's not mad at me or anything.

He looked up. He made an attempt to fake smile, and said: "I'm fine. Why do you say that-"

"Cut the crap Izuku. You can't lie to me like that. Trust me, I know what a fake smile looks like. I see it everyday in the mirror." His smile faded. Damn, this kid look just about ready to crack.

"Sorry. . . "

I sighed. "Don't be. Just don't try that stunt again. I might have to slap you if you do."

He looked slightly surprised, but then managed a weak smile. "O-okay. Yeah, I'll keep that in mind." He set his hands on his desk and looked at them.

I set my bag down next to my desk, and sat down. "So," I started and turned my head towards him. "You gonna tell me why you're upset or not?"

He looked my way. "U-uhm. Do we have to-now?"

"I wouldn't make you do it right now. Just eventually. Preferably soon."

"W-well, even if I do it's probably not gonna benefit you any. And plus I'm not going to tell you why I'm sad just-" He paused for a second and sighed. ". . . Just what I'm feeling." He turned his attention back to his hands.

He  never avoids eye contact. It must be really bad whatever is weighing him down that much.

"Cool. That's fine. If you want, I can tell you what I feel every day. Then, hey, look, we both get the slight benefit of getting stuff off our shoulders." I looked at him expectantly, awaiting a response.

"I. . . I suppose that would be alright." He turned his gaze back at me and slightly smiled.

"Okay, now that that's settled.. . ." I turned my gaze to my desk and stretched my arms out in front of me. "I'm gonna take a nap before people start arriving." I heard him laugh quietly. I laid my arms out and put my head them. "Night. . . " He laughed silently again. I could tell from the sound of it that he also put his arms on the table and laid his head down.

I heard him quietly mumble, "Night. . .Hito." And with that, we both dazed off, simply waiting for the day to end.

HELLOOOOOO!!! I"M BACK! I am so so so so sorry I didn't post anything for over two weeks. I don't even have an excuse for it. I was also just in Louisiana for about three days, so there's that. ANYWAYS, just a little spoiler. . . the Sports Festival is coming up. So yea I have many plans. Okay, that's all i gotta say BYYEEEE!

-Theo- (That's what I go by now. Okay, bye, thanks for reading.)