Vanilla's Poser Girl

Chapter 7

Leigh

Nanghihinang napasandal ako sa pintuan ng makalabas ako. I know Van is too scared. She's feeling it. The effects of those drugs in her body.

"Leigh.."

Umiling lang ako kay Samantha. We all heard the crashing of everything inside the room.

Gusto kong pumasok at yakapin si Van. But I just can't. She's afraid that she might force me to satisfy her. I won't let her hate herself even more. I won't turn her to be another monster. If she forced me, the markings will be complete. She'll be another monster like Carmi and we will definitely lose her.

So, No. I won't do it.

I'm so sorry, Vanilla. Please be strong. I'll pull you out. I promise to pull you up. I'll come rushing to you, crashing.

"Kayleigh, step away. Van needs us."

Isa-isang tumulo yung luha ko. This is all my fault. I know how vulnerable Vanilla is. Pero iniwan ko pa din sya. Mas pinili ko pa din yung tumakbo. I let her drift away. Now she's drowning. And I'm still letting her by herself.

If I stayed, she won't ever feel lonely. She won't feel alone. I know that she's gaining her strength on me. Na kaya hindi ito natatakot kasi alam nito that I'll came to fight and protect her.

She's my baby. Everyone knows it. They know how much I'll protect Van. Van may be our weakest link, but she's a pure heart. She's the total opposite of Sam. Si Van kasi hindi nag-iisip sa bawat ginagawa nito. She just let her heart to do things. And that stupid heart is deceiving.

But it always seek you, Leigh. You ran away. That's why Van is forced to live in the darkness to survive.

Pero kung hindi ako tumakbo, ako naman yung lulubog. I'm nothing but a self-saving ass.

"Leigh.." Maging si Sammie ay halatang hirap na hirap na din.

Umiling lang ako ulit. I know this. I've studied everything. I perfectly know how to deal with everyone. They're just like an instrument. You just need to know their tone, their beat.

Everything is as easy as that. But here's Vanilla. Just the thought of her shattering, breaking into her own demons. It's scaring me too. One wrong move and I am going to lose her forever.

So no, I have to stay still. I know Van's beat. She can still stretch herself some more.

"I'll get out of my zone, Sammie." Sabi ko dito. "When that time comes, don't try to save me. Don't tell anything to Van. Just let her be saved, okay? She needs it."

"Leigh.."

"I'll be fine. I'm stronger than her. Remember when we were kids? When everyone is losing hope?"

Kinagat na lang ni Sammie yung pang-ibabang labi nito. She's trying not to get too emotional too.

"She's showing symptoms, Sam. She was forced. The blink of her eyes, the hitch as she gasped for air, her ragged breathing, the sweats in her forehead, the irradical patterns of her heartbeat." Parang pati ako nanghihina. Just the thought of someone forcing Van, is making me to lose my grip in sanity.

All this time, my sweet innocent Vanilla. 

"Damn, Sam. Why?!" Nababaliw na din ako.  "She raped her! That woman dared to force my innocent lamb! Did she drugged her, Sam? Or did she just plainly took her with brute and force?"

I felt my hands shaking. My voice is also trembling.

Imagine the girl you watched to transform into a woman. Imagine the one you've taken good care of. Imagine the girl you've reserved for someone who truly deserves her.