Painting this canvas with the colors of our love

Mom

"I'm here" I said coming into the attendants' room to find Dr. Lowen sat at the table, hear head leaning against her palms. "Are you alright?" I asked rushing at her side.
"Yes yes I'm okay I'm just really tired" she said caressing my cheek with her thumb but her eyes looked sad.
"Well... where is Blythe why isn't she helping you?" I asked trying to figure out what was going on.
"She was helping me, you must've notice that it looks like hell out there..." she said.
"Yes in fact this isn't a good night" I said "so you just need more help? I'll go change and get to work"
"I did call you for help but wait a second" she said stopping me from getting off the chair.
"So what is it? You're making me anxious" I said finally understanding that something was wrong.
"It's her, Blythe, she collapsed while she was pushing a patient bed from the corridor to one of the available rooms left" she went on talking but I was deaf at the moment.
"Where is she, I wanna see her"
"You can't right now, we are running some tests, she had a really high fever when she fainted and we don't know what this might be" she said pinning her eyes into mine to make sure I understood.
"No... this can't be, I mean there is no reported case here, they're like in Brasil and France, not here." I said.
"This could very well be, Sylvia many ethnicities mix up in this city and this could be it, whatever it is"
"Oh my God" I said trying to think what I could do to help "so has someone checked her patients, to see who she had any kind of interaction with? We might find who infected her. I mean it must've been someone who was sick and came here for help right?" I said trying to suggest something helpful.
"It could be just about anyone, we don't know, what we need to know is what she has but I don't want you anywhere near her until we know for sure. Okay? You can't risk it, with your condition, and even more important you have a family now, you must be careful for them, you're not by yourself anymore"
"So what am I doing here exactly?Because I can't sit here waiting for labs doing just nothing it would make me crazy" I said.
"Oh we got plenty of work to do in the pit, there were several car crashes and we could use another pair of hands, so go down there and keep your eyes open wide, if you have even the slightest suspect, based on what you read, don't lay one finger on that patient until you have all that is necessary to protect yourself first. Are we clear? Remember, you're not a hero you're just doing your job" She said taking my hand and squeezing it.
"I understand" I said and got up to go change my clothes still in a trance from when she told me about B.
I was helping out doctors and nurses and it looked like an apocalyptic scenario, I thought if I had the time to just stop and watch what was happening around me that would have scared me to death and that was why I was focusing on the patients instead.
"Are they all the ones from the car crash?" I asked a paramedic who was pushing a gurney inside. "Yes, we had some other people transferred to other hospitals since you're pretty packed up here"
"You bet, thanks" I said taking her place in pushing the gurney.
It was really crowded and people were shouting to one another as I started checking the patient parameters, I couldn't hear perfectly but she didn't look too bad, in fact with the side of my eyes I saw her trying to take off her mask.
"No ma'am you really need this trust me, this is going to be okay, you're safe now, don't worry" I tried to comfort her to keep her calm.
"Where's my daughter?" She tried to ask when she was finally able to take a deep breath.
"Was she in the car with you?" I asked trying to understand if it was true or just some nonsense that needed a neuro check.
"Yes" she said and paused for a while probably in pain because I was pretty sure she had at least a couple of broken ribs "she was feeling bad, she had been for a couple of days but tonight her temperature wouldn't go down so we were coming here when she started convulsing in the backseat so my husband got distracted and caused the accident." She explained.
"I'll go look for her ok?" I said because I felt sorry for what had happened to them and it wasn't even entirely their fault.
"Yes please, she's 10 she has long blonde hair, green eyes and she was still wearing her pajama when we left from home" she gave a quick description.
"I'll be back soon" I said leaving her side so she let go of my hand and I started looking for a girl but every gurney I saw didn't have any little girl. It looked like there weren't any kids around so I just double checked the corridors, asked some nurses if they had seen a little girl but they all confirmed there were no babies that night. I looked up in the admitted patients list on a computer but none in the last few hours was around the age of ten so I assumed they must've brought her to a different hospital. I asked a nurse to check on a couple of other hospitals were it was more likely the ambulance could've brought her. And then I finally found her so I got back at the patient's bed.
"We did find her ma'am but she's not here. The ambulance brought her to another hospital, I am sure she is receiving the best cures, I asked for her condition but they didn't have any update yet, we will monitor that situation and keep you updated, how does that sound?" I asked trying to smile at her to reassure her.
"Thank you, is my husband alive?" She then asked.
"He's... hum, very good doctors are taking care of him, he was the most injured, but he is strong, and they're going to do the best they can to save him" I said.
Tears started streaming down her face and I tried to comfort her since the wave of ambulances coming had calmed down and the situation inside was being stabilized I figured I could take care of her better until about one hour after one of the nurses called for me on the phone.
"It is probably an update on your daughter, I'll get that and tell you what they say" I said and she let go of me immediately, she was terrified and I hope I wouldn't have to deliver to her some bad news.
"Doctor DeLuca we were able to stabilize the kid and we are running tests now but we think it might have been just seizures due to the high temperature. In kids it can happen easily" a voice of a man said on the other side of the phone as I took the call.
"It's not, run some lab test, actually all of them would be better" I said avoiding explanations.
"We can't just run tests indiscriminately, she is being taken care of and she's stable now"
"Ok now listen to me Dr. Caron we've a had a similar case here, a doctor collapsed while pushing a gurney because of the unreasonably high fever and she had seizures after that too" I said "our virology department has been doing research for weeks now receiving matching cases from Europe and South America too, so run those damned labs, it won't be a waste of money and you'll probably have a chance to save a little kid's life, which is just doing your job right" I said and shut the phone on him.
Asshole.
I went back to my patient to at least tell her her daughter was stable but I left some other informations out until I was sure. She could now breathe on her own so I calmly took a surgical face mask, the only thing that was around for me to use and gently put that on her mouth and nose carefully and I wore one too, she gave me a worried glance so I tried to reassure her.
"It's fine it's just a precaution, don't worry we're going to take care of you" I said.
She seemed to trust me enough at that point so she just let me be in charge of the situation. I pushed and pulled her bed through a lot of allways until we reached the isolation rooms.
"Isn't it better? To be away from all that yelling?" I asked, she slightly nodded.
I proceeded to ask her a few questions on her general condition, she was just bruised and the collar to stabilize her neck was pretty much all she needed she was now able to breathe on her own so I was probably just worrying too much, I wasn't sure her daughter had the same thing B had and actually I wasn't even sure B had that thing, whatever it was, but it's always better safe than sorry right?
I was trying to figure out what to do with her, there was no protocol there, everything from then on I did just based on my suspect and my judgment. So I paged Dr Lowen. She would have been able to tell me what to do.
When she finally found me I closed the door to isolate me and the patient and signaled her to take the phone that was on her side and I took the one on mine.
"What is happening?!" She asked.
"This patient came from the car crash, she was the less injured so when she was able she asked me about her daughter who apparently was the reason they were in their car on the way here because she had been experiencing a very high fever for days and while they were in the car she started convulsing... The father, her husband, which is now in trauma 1, got distracted and caused the accident. I looked for her daughter and found her, I spoke to the Dr who was taking care of her and advised him to run the same labs you're running on B." I said trying to be less explicit as possible because I didn't want to alarm the patient.
"Get out of there right now" she said.
"I can't, before she told me that I examined her..." I took a deep breath because it was harder to breath with the mask on and I hadn't done what she told me to do "...without the gloves because we had run out of them out there and she needed  immediate intervention"
"Goddammit" she clenched her fist and closed her eyes.
"I am sorry, I couldn't imagine... I brought her here as soon as I figured out anyway and none else has had any contact with us" I said "I'm sorry I failed, I could've done better I know."
"You did what you could, you put the patient first I can't blame you for that,  you took the signals and acted responsibly after so you did your best"
"Her husband should be isolated too but he's still being treated so I couldn't do anything about that.."
"I'll take care of that, now I need a blood sample of the patient, get it and I'll take it to lab"
"I have news from the other side though, in the past few hours what we thought was probably a virus has been isolated and they're sequencing the DNA. We'll have more informations by the time it's done..."
"Good, how's B?" I asked her not knowing when I would've been able to get out to go see her.
"She's stable for now but I must tell you and I won't sugar coat it, her condition is serious and we don't know yet if this is the worst it can get" she said.
I nodded as I was unable to vocalize my thoughts. I was just so scared, I didn't even know how much time I would've had to spend in that room and not being able to get back to Sarah and Vanessa.
"We're not going to leave you alone, you'll have constant support, did you hear me?" She asked.
"Yeah..." I said briefly.
"Incubation time seems to be around a week, you'll need to stay there but you are going to be okay, it's just a week. You can do this, you have overcome worse things" she said trying to motivate me.
"I know, I'll be okay and I'll take care of her since I'm stuck here too."
"Exactly, when she wakes up tell her what is going on, ask her if she had been experiencing any cold-like symptoms"
"Yes, ok" I said wiping the tears from my eyes.
"I'll update you on Blythe as soon as I get news" she said, I believed to make feel better, but that wasn't helping so I just nodded my head and hung up, she did too and hurried her way probably to the pit.
So I was stuck again, one year and a half latere there I was again. I rested my head on the glass panel and tried to think about the way I could've possibly explained that to Sarah... I had to call her.
I took the phone in the pocket of my white gown and I called.
"Babe it's me, Sylvia, I'm really sorry to wake you but... I need you to listen to me very carefully and I want you stay calm okay?" I said when she picked up.
"No babe I was awake I got your note, it's fine, what's going on?" She asked and she even seemed to be in a good mood.
I took a deep breath before continuing.
I tried my best to keep it simple but also explain everything, she stayed so silent the whole time that I could even hear Vanessa asking her what was going on.
"I'm coming there I have to see you, can I at least see you? Oh my god how did this happen..." she said before she was cut off from a sob.
"Hey hey I need you to keep it together for Vanessa, Sarah please, she only has you at the moment, you can't lose it, she's your responsibility" I said trying to make her snap out of the panic but I knew it was difficult because I felt like crying myself.
"I need to see you, I need to talk to you" she said.
"It's not safe to bring Vanessa here and she can't be home alone" I said.
"Honey please don't do this to me, the last time I left you in a hospital I never saw you again for one year. Well, didn't she have a point?
"Fine, when you arrive, don't come all the way in, ask to a nurse for doctor Lowen, she will give you both a mask and she will take you here trying to avoid the most crowded hallways. Okay?"
"Okay we're on our way, I love you" she said and hung up faster than I was able to say 'me too'.
I spent the time waiting for her frantically walking up and down the room, but it was like I had forgotten someone else was in that room so when I heard the patient waking up I realized I didn't know how to tell her all of that." I had never taken my mask off and I didn't have taken her off either so that was the first question she asked preparing the ground for me to explain the situation with all the reassurance I was capable of.
She then, understandably, had a panic attack, I tried to calm her, to make her stop screaming and crying but all I said was useless, I was afraid that with the pression for screaming her broken ribs would've caused damage to her lungs but what happened next wasn't exactly what I was expecting, she had stopped screaming so I thought this was a good sign but she had only stopped because she wasn't able to breathe in. She collapsed on the bed and at that point I called for help ringing the alarm aside the bed. Oh dear God. I was trying with an oxygen mask but this really didn't help so when I understood what was happening I was confronted with the fact that those rooms weren't equipped for emergencies. So I got my pen out of my pocket, I got rid of the tip and the ink so I had just the little plastic tube. Fortunately I kept a little scalpel in my pocket to help me cut the wires when I did sutures so I used it to make a little incision on the side of her chest and without thinking too much I stuck the pen with a little more power and heard that little noise of air that came through the little pen tube, that made me sigh in relief for the fact I was right and that she had already took one big breath because the air compressing her lungs was coming out of the pen tube. I waited until fluid started leaking from the pen, that was the sign no more air was where it wasn't supposed to be, to get the damned pen out of her chest. She was still unconscious but her vitals looked okay and she was breathing fine so when I raised my eyes again I saw Sarah, Vanessa and Dr Lowen all wearing masks and staring at me from the other side of the glass.
I ran to the phone and Dr Lowen asked what had happened.
"Pneumothorax" I said still trying to catch my breath for the scare and the rush.
"How did you do it?" She asked with half a smile on her face.
I sat on the floor, leaned my back against the wall and showed her the pen tube.
"You saved her life, I know that wasn't me who taught you that but I'm proud of you"
"Thank you" I said breathing heavily.
"What do you need?" She asked.
"Emergency equipment?" I said "and my insulin"
"I got you" she pointing at the shots she had placed in the little box through which the room communicated with the outside.
"Can I talk to Sarah?" I said doing one shot of insulin.
"Sure" she said and passed the phone to her.
"Babe how are you?" she said kneeling down to look at me.
"I'm okay" I said looking at Dr Lowen who was taking care of Vanessa while Sarah talked to me.
"Oh my God we saw what just happened babe you saved that woman's life" she said.
"Yep, that's the only thing I'll do for the next week" I said "but who will save me if I start getting sick? Someone else must come in and they could get infected it's dangerous. You shouldn't even be here given Vanessa's condition." I said.
"Hey, hey, you'll be fine, you won't get sick it's going to be okay." She said "I know I shouldn't have brought her but I was worried sick about you, I just couldn't leave you here" she said.
"I know" I said placing my hand on the glass where her cheek should've been. She touched the glass too in the same spot of my hand.
"I love you so much, you know that."
"I know, I love you too, I'm sorry this happened, I didn't mean it of course" I said.
"Of course you didn't babe, I know" she reassured me.
"I need you to be strong, take care of her, I can't be there so you have to be the both of us, I know you can handle that, you're so great." I said to her.
"I know, I will and I need you to still be okay in a week okay? You have to be okay, I can't afford to loose you"
"I'll do my best, I always do" I said moving forward to lean my head against the glass panel.
"I know you do" she said before Vanessa got into the conversation.
We had a little talk I explained her why I couldn't get home with them, that I needed to stay there for a while but that I would've been coming home with them soon enough and that she had nothing to worry about, but putting all of this into terms for children was hard and she was a smart kid, she smelled crap from miles away. "But I will miss you, one week is too much" she complained.
"Baby I have to stay, you know I am taking care of this very special patient, it's an honor to be here, see it like that: I am doing something very special one day you could be proud of, okay?" I asked smiling to repress the tears.
"Mhmh but-" she was about to ask something else when an alarm started ringing, beside the very first seconds not understanding what was going on it occurred to me that they were probably isolating the whole ward we were in and Sarah and Vanessa shouldn't have been there. Vanessa had started crying so I took the phone back "hey baby, baby, everything is okay, the siren is no big deal but now you have to go, because I have to get to work, okay?" I tried but she was completely panicked.
"No I want you to come with us" she cried, I looked at Sarah trying to make her do something so she gently grabbed Vanessa by her shoulder.
"I can't baby, I can't" I said in despair.
Vanessa cried louder because she didn't want Sarah to take her home.
"No I wanna stay" she cried but eventually Sarah said something, I couldn't hear what it was, that made her give up the fight "I love you, you're my mom and you will always be, I need you" she cried before hanging the phone and I couldn't even say I loved her too, I could just stay there, my heart beating so fast from the moment she had called me her mom for the first time...

It's just insane how fare we've come so, given that today we hit 11k, I figured it wasn't a bad thing to publish the new chapter as a gift for this achievement. So yeah, I hope you liked it and that you're looking forward to the next one and that you appreciated the gift, I just finished writing at 2 am 😂
As usual let me know what you think if you feel like it, vote, add to reading list, comment, share, tell your friends, do whatever hahaha love you all... stay safe ❤️
P.S: happy pride month 🌈💕