Lessons learned

Chapter 34

'Ben please.' I beg and he looks down at me.

'Nic-' he starts but I take his hand and pull him next to me. 'Calli, Indi show Ben around the campus while I talk to Peter.' I demand.

'Nic-' Indiana says but I glare at her and she sighs before leading Ben and Calli away.

I walk past Peter putting my bag on my bed silently praying that he won't make this too much of a big deal. I just want him to leave, I'm not ready to have him here yet.

'So you've moved on from me then?' His voice is small and when I turn to face him he's leaning up against my wall, looking incredibly hot.

'Excuse me?'

'You've moved on from me.' He looked down at the floor sadly and confusion took over.

'Why does that make you sad Peter?'

'Because I-'

'Because you want me to be depressed over you forever? Do you like having someone pining after you is that it?' He is unbelievable right now.

'No it's just that I thought you really liked me, I don't know.' He ran his hands through his hair in distress before looking at me again.

'Well if you must know, me and Ben are just friends.' I tell him before pulling my clothes out of the suitcase messily before throwing them onto my bed.

'We were just friends Nic.' His voice is so small it makes me angry, what the heck is he trying to say?

'I know thanks for reminding me.' I remarked.

'Where were you?' He asked forcefully.

'Why do you need to know? My point of leaving was so that I didn't have to deal with your bullshit.' I need him to leave now because I don't know how long I can keep pretending that I'm alright.

'It scared me, I thought you were going to drop uni.' He laughed slightly but I stopped moving and looked up at him.

'You thought I would ruin my education for you?' I laugh at the irony and he takes a step towards me.

'Nicolette, listen I'm sorry for what happened between us.' He placed his hand on my forearm and I froze.

'You're sorry?'

As if his stupid unmeaningful apology would make me feel better, he really is a clueless piece of shit.

'I really am.'

'Well I'm fine.' I tell him but he looks deep in my eyes as if he's trying to sense how I really feel but I build my guard back up and pull away from him.

'You're not fine.' He concludes.

Yeah well no shit.

'I am, now I'd appreciate it if you could leave.'

'I'm not leaving until I know you're alright.' He persists so I go to my last resort.

'I'm sorry, don't you have a girlfriend to attend to?' The words hurt but they have the intended effect as his eyes go wide at my comment.

'Urm, yeah I guess.' He steps away from me and moves to the door.

'Um Nic.' When I turn back to him he hands me a small leather bound book.

'What-'

'Just read it okay?' He then left before I could respond.

I move to sit on my bed running my fingers over the cover of the little black book with the words 'For my eyes only'  printed.