selfish | salia

Chapter 20

Before you read this chapter, I'd just like to reiterate that the Simon in these books is in no way what I imagine him to be in real life! I really look up and respect Simon, he is an amazing person who has helped me through more than most! And if this doesn't hint to you the type of chapter this one will be, I don't know what will. Also, to my friend Luci, I am very sorry if this chapter makes you cry x

"Two minutes," I said quietly, myself and Simon huddled over my computer. We had my spotify account on refresh, waiting for the songs to appear. This would be Simon's first time listening to my voice, really.

The songs were all about Owen, which was part of the reason I had been so hesitant to release them. Well, until now.

"I'm so nervous," I admitted, looking over at Simon who looked deep in thought.

"Don't be. Everyone is going to love it, I know I will. Just trust the process," he advised me, pressing a small kiss to my forehead.

"One minute!" I said excitedly as the time changed to fifty nine minutes past. "Holy shit, okay, this is really happening."

"This is really happening!" Simon reiterated, and my stomach was a mess. Butterflies erupted in my stomach. This was happening a lot sooner than I had anticipated, but it was still happening!

"Refresh the page! It's time!" Simon said excitedly, taking over the mouse to click refresh. The songs appeared underneath my name, my name, and my songs were there, people would be listening to them right now.

"Which one do you recommend first?" Simon asked, hovering over the three songs.

"You listen in any order. I'm just...going to the bathroom," I excused myself. "I'm fine," I repeated, after a concerned Simon called after me. "Listen to the songs and tell me what you think of them!" I said sweetly before shutting the bathroom door, perching myself on the toilet seat.

Deep breaths, Talia. All was fine. Everything was good. Eloise had pulled off a madness today, and I would owe her a massive favour. So why was I still panicking?

Angele. I needed Angele. I called her, impatiently waiting for her to pick up. Come on, Angele. You usually picked up quicker.

She picked up on the sixth ring, finally.

"Talia! Hey! I'm actually right in the middle of listening to your songs, I forgot how good they were!"

"I should be happy, right? I should be happy that Owen lost, that my songs are out...but I'm not. Deep down I'm still angry that he forced me to release my songs earlier than I wanted...and don't even get me started on Simon. If this whole Owen drama hadn't cropped up today, we wouldn't even be speaking right now," I confessed.

There was silence, presumably she was trying to think about what to say.

"Angele...are you still there?" I asked tentatively, holding the phone closer to my ear.

"I'm still here, Tee. Maybe Owen did force you to release the songs earlier than you planned to, but they are amazing songs and it means that you've officially commenced your music career...I know it's hard, but you just have to focus on the positives, and in this case, there are loads of them. As for the situation with Simon, I don't really know how to help. You're clearly still mad at him, so you guys can't just sweep this under the carpet. You need to talk it out with him. It's how relationships work, communication is key, as you always used to lecture me."

"When the hell did you get so smart?" I laughed, already feeling more relieved than I had a couple minutes previous. "Thanks, Ang. You're the best, I'll leave you alone now so you can carry on listening to my songs!" I apologised, hanging up the phone.