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Chapter 57. Revelations

Alexander's p.o.v.
Why? Why was I so careless? If I had just asked her where she went last night, she would have told me on her own. I had to be all insecure and emotional enough to make that dramatic move of throwing her the photos. I didn't think this through and now she has run off feeling betrayed and has completely lost trust in me. How can I fix this? How can I mend her broken heart and bring her back to me?
I pick up the phone and call off the man I hired to follow her, as I felt that this had to be the first step I should take to find my way back to her. Another woman would probably find this flattering even, but Claire had already experienced too much control and doubt from her ex, so this freaked her out.
"Mario, I will no longer need you to follow Claire around, so you can return to your previous duties."
"Ok boss. Should I give you one last report?"
Although I know where she is, I want to make sure, as this would ease my mind.
"She is at Paul's, yes?" I ask and he confirms.
*My love I just want to know if you are ok and to let you know, my bodyguard isn't following you anymore. I was only trying to keep you safe. Lets talk about this whole thing tomorrow after work. Please pick me up at 8.*
Half an hour passes by but she doesn't answer, so I try again.
*I miss you! I love you! I can't live without you.*
But her answer feels like a punch in the stomach.
*Sorry, I will not be working for you anymore. You can ask the bodyguard to take my place until you find another driver. Oh and I promise you I am fine, but I am not going to do the same mistakes I did with Michael so no dinner tomorrow and I think it's better not to see each other anytime soon, because the wound is too fresh. I need time to at least have you back in my life as a friend.*
I punch the table and I immediately regret it, as my fracture is still very freshly healed, so it's easier to break.
*You are killing me.💔* I text her, but she doesn't reply.
My inside is constantly asking for her, so I am now in my car on my way to Paul's.
"Hey man. I need to talk to you and I am on my way there. Are you home?"
"You know she is here, so cut the crap. Meet me at the pub around the corner, cause she doesn't want to see you."
"Thanks, I appreciate it." I honestly say.
I walk into that pub and I take a seat at a table that is the furthest away from everyone else in that shit hole we are in. I see him entering, only a couple of minutes later and I wave my hand for him to see me.
"Is she ok." I ask worriedly.
"What do you think? I can't believe you did this to her. You know how hard it was for her to trust anyone and her wounds haven't healed yet, so why are you scratching them?"
"I know man! Fuck! I know I fucked up but when I saw the photo of her kissing that man I lost it."
"Like Michael lost it, when he thought she was cheating on him and look where that got him. Besides, it's not only about losing your coolness and revealing that you have been tailing after the woman that you are supposed to trust, it's about doubting her."
"I knew there would be an explanation, but if you saw a picture of your girlfriend kissing another guy in the mouth what would you do?"
"I would never have someone spying on her in the first place, so she would have told me by herself along with the explanation, never giving me the chance to doubt her."
"He was only watching her for protection. You have no idea what she means to me, I couldn't let anything like that happen to her again."
"Then you should have made it clear to him that his role was to keep her safe, not to send you pictures and inform you of her every step. You have violated her privacy and I don't think she can get over this."
"What's that suppose to mean? That's not a reason for a couple to break up. I know she needs time, but she will come back to me, she has to. I love her and she loves me, shit will always happen and we will work this out surely. This is why I called you tonight, as I know she listens to you and I would appreciate some help here."
He smiles ironically and looks at me without saying anything for a while. I know he can influence her, as although it bothers me, she seams to trust him more than me. He can see how much I love her, so all I have to do is convince him to help me by speaking to her. I order another round of drinks and I wait for his reaction.
"Look, I can't and I honestly won't."
"What you mean is, you can but you won't. Why? Come on man, you know we love each other so much, this isn't as bad as it sounds and yes, he was telling me everything about her and I knew it was wrong, but I have now released him of his duties. We all make mistakes and this is not a mistake to cost us our relationship."
"Do you know how long I 've been waiting for you to make a mistake?"
What the fuck is he talking about?
"I fell in love with Claire, from the first time I laid my eyes on her but all these months I was being nothing more than a true good friend for her. I always knew I'd eventually get my chance at some point as I was sure you'd fuck up sooner or later. I have to admit it to you, I thought it would be much sooner, but you actually did quite good so far. I began to feel a little desperate but finally you tripped."
"Please tell me you are joking, because if you are not, next thing you know is that my fist will be in love with your jaw."
"Look Alexander, I am not going to lie to you and never have I lied to her. I have only been a supportive friend all this time and I would never try anything on her while you guys were together, but if she is serious about leaving you, then I owe it to her and to myself to come clean with my feelings at some point when an opportunity presents itself. I am being honest instead of going behind your back and you should appreciate that, instead of threatening me."
"Take it all back now!" I command and I feel my nails sinking in my fist's skin, making my knuckles turn white .
"I am not going to force anything on her. I am just going to come clean, although I know I am risking my friendship with her, which is something very real and valuable to me. If you guys were together for life, I would have moved on and I would forever cherished her as a friend, but now that I have a chance to finally tell her how I feel, I will grab it."
I pull him from his blouse and I am excessively breathing trying so hard not to hit him.
"You are dishonest and I saw right through you from the moment she first mentioned your name. I don't know what it was that warned me, but I knew. You won't go anywhere near her and I promise you this friendship will soon come to an end one way or another."
"Dishonest? When was I dishonest? I never tried anything with her and here I am now, even telling you about it as if I need to take your permission. Well I don't! The only thing I will promise you is that I will never force her into anything, but I need to see if she has any other feelings for me, besides friendly ones I mean."
"You son of a ..." and I punch him. He punches me back, but a second later I have him laying on the floor ready to smash his face beyond repair. Then I realize Claire will see him and I can't let him use this to gain her sympathy, so I stop.
I get out of the pub and I call her, but she doesn't pick up.
*Please my angel, pick up! I really need to talk to you.*
*Alexander please stop this! Leave me alone.*
*Paul is not who you think he is. Please just give me five minutes. That's all I ask.*
But the message is not delivered. I call her, but only to confirm my fears that she has turned off her cellphone.
"Fuuuuck!" I roar.
I should have beaten him up after all, so that he would have to go to the hospital instead of back to her. I swear to God, if he touches her I will cut his hands off.